Resident Evil (2002)
What?
22 September 2005
(This contains minor spoilers) As a fan of action movies, as well as the zombie genre in particular, I was fairly excited to see this movie. Sadly, it makes no sense. The plot - if it could be called such a thing - is only briefly referenced, and the rest of the movie is people running from poorly-animated creatures, obnoxious music cues ("Let's take the stairs!" cue exciting, techno music for the ten seconds of climbing down stairs), and awkwardly-placed flashbacks. Poor acting from people who should know better, cheesy dialogue and short-sighted directing from Paul WS Anderson, who should but obviously doesn't. My favorite moment in the entire film is when our heroes are completely surrounded by zombies in a tunnel with no way out. Anderson wisely cuts to a shot of an unrelated empty hallway and cuts back to the characters having made some sort of miraculous escape.

And of course, there's the ending, where the enjoyable Jason Isaacs makes a good-sport-style cameo in a rather pointless scene that doesn't appear to connect with anything we've just witnessed, including a creature that would make a Harryhausen stop-motion flick look like Lord of the Rings. Good job, all around. I'll avoid the sequel.
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