Blackenstein (1973)
4/10
Horror and blaxploitation with Malcomb & Eddie.
7 November 2006
Warning: Spoilers
I wanted to originally call this the original "Malcolm & Eddie" but apparently the guy's name in this movie is Malcomb. Whatever.

The blaxploitation phenomenon of the early 1970's yielded some very interesting and memorable product, albeit low-budget. There were a number of black themed horror films that were made. Many are aware of the Blacula series that probably gave ideas to Eddie Murphy and Wes Craven when they made Vampire In Brooklyn during one of Eddie's many low periods. Of course, they also decided to remake Frankenstein.

The movie begins as Dr. Winifred Walker has come to her mentor Dr. Stein in Los Angeles asking for his help. Her boyfriend Eddie Turner is a Vietnam vet who came back to the U.S. with both his arms and legs amputated due to a landmine explosion. Dr. Stein is one of those "mad doctors", although he's not "mad" in the sense. His experiments in healing and DNA are only known to a select few. He agrees to help Eddie.

During the operation, which takes three steps, Dr. Stein's assistant Malcomb falls in love with Dr. Walker. He professes his love for her. Winifred tells Malcomb that she can only like Malcomb as a friend because she loves Eddie and wants to marry him once he's recovered. Malcomb then switches Eddie's DNA with the DNA of someone (something?) else and when they keep injecting the DNA in him, he mutates into the title character: BLACKENSTEIN! Of course, Blacky goes around killing his victims; although he seems to have an agenda when it comes to his slayings. The first one who dies is a male nurse that would verbally assault him for going to Vietnam and wouldn't give him ice cream. His slaying is done behind a screen and we see him pounded into hamburger and then having HIS limbs torn apart. All this while the doctors try to figure out why Eddie has mutated to this form.

The acting in this movie is atrocious. It is obvious none of the actors were naturals. Malcomb, played by Roosevelt Jones, does come off as effective due to Jones' wooden acting since he is playing a simple but sinister man. I did like the spiel of victim Number One, played by Bob Brophy; it's kind of a rant that was expected by the former hippies by 1973. The lighting is terrible, the sets are cheap looking and the script for the most part is on the level of George Lucas' efforts. There's too much dead time and the movie lurches from scene to scene. And boy, does Blacky move slow and look silly with his afro and threads.

If you do like bad movies, this is worthy, but it is missing that special ingredient that something like Plan 9 From Outer Space or Showgirls offered. There is better in every genre (blaxploitation, horror, so-bad-it's good or a mix) so you should look elsewhere.
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