Usually a bad movie inspires a writer to reach new heights of invective, but this so-called movie defies description. A short blonde girl with a really weird voice, dressed in a Catholic high-school uniform, two guys who flourish power tools, and an old guy who was supposed to have known the original "Black Dahlia" have teamed up to lure actress wannabes into an old jail cafeteria kitchen, where they strap them to a table and cut them up, then taking body parts to various places and piling them up, while the police scratch their heads in wonder.
First of all, don't be fooled into thinking that this is the Brian DePalma film. I have a weakness for DePalma, from "Carrie" and "Body Double" on forward--so a little gore doesn't disturb me. It's just that this gore is so stupid.
This masterpiece comes from the hands of Ulli Lommel, and indeed the film is called "Ulli Lommel's Black Dahlia." Who is Ulli Lommel? Well, apparently he was a child actor, a protégé of Fassbinder and then of Andy Warhol. He is over 60, but he makes films that would embarrass most high-school videotape proto-Spielbergs. The screenplay does nothing to reveal what moves its central characters, the psychopaths, to do what they do--not even a little. Most of the action consists of women screaming while we hear the noises of power tools--most notably a reciprocating saw--and see spurts of Hershey's syrup--straight from the convenient squeeze bottle!--covering their faces.
There is absolutely nothing to recommend this film, which is part of a straight-to-DVD series about serial killers that Lommel seems to have arranged for himself. Obviously he thinks he's doing something grand, but from where I'm sitting it looks to me like a huge con. I am reminded of early John Waters (think "Pink Flamingoes") but obviously Waters has grown from that early effort. At 60-plus, I hardly imagine that Lommel is going to do much growing-- he's just going to sit around playing with his own caca.
First of all, don't be fooled into thinking that this is the Brian DePalma film. I have a weakness for DePalma, from "Carrie" and "Body Double" on forward--so a little gore doesn't disturb me. It's just that this gore is so stupid.
This masterpiece comes from the hands of Ulli Lommel, and indeed the film is called "Ulli Lommel's Black Dahlia." Who is Ulli Lommel? Well, apparently he was a child actor, a protégé of Fassbinder and then of Andy Warhol. He is over 60, but he makes films that would embarrass most high-school videotape proto-Spielbergs. The screenplay does nothing to reveal what moves its central characters, the psychopaths, to do what they do--not even a little. Most of the action consists of women screaming while we hear the noises of power tools--most notably a reciprocating saw--and see spurts of Hershey's syrup--straight from the convenient squeeze bottle!--covering their faces.
There is absolutely nothing to recommend this film, which is part of a straight-to-DVD series about serial killers that Lommel seems to have arranged for himself. Obviously he thinks he's doing something grand, but from where I'm sitting it looks to me like a huge con. I am reminded of early John Waters (think "Pink Flamingoes") but obviously Waters has grown from that early effort. At 60-plus, I hardly imagine that Lommel is going to do much growing-- he's just going to sit around playing with his own caca.