Review of Kickboxer

Kickboxer (1989)
7/10
Truly 80's Van Damme
12 July 2007
Warning: Spoilers
This film has all the hallmarks of a classic Van Damme martial arts/art-house movie. The opening credit sequence is pure genius, going along the river in a power boat, Van Damme wearing a sleveless denim jacket, his on screen brother wearing a floral shirt, sleeves rolled up, permed mullet and moustache flowing in the wind. I particularly enjoyed watching van damme put his arm around his brother as they sailed through the river, very homo-erotic. The cheesy 80's song to accompany this scene is like the cherry on the cake, with lyrics like "I Don't Care What You Think, I Could Kill If You Blink", we know we're in for a treat with this movie.

As usual with Van Damme films we are shown in the most subtle of manners how he developed his Belgian accent. We discover that Jean Claude was raised in Europe and learnt Ballet whilst his brother was raised in America by their father. I made the presumption the parents were divorced.

Watching Jean Claude learn Mui Thai with Master Zian was awe inspiring and gave a true insight into the 'old ways' of mastering this martial art. He did not need to visit a Mui Thai school or perhaps indulge in a few evening classes. No, it involved having his legs pulled apart with ropes, kicking down palm trees, coconuts dropped onto him from a great height, raw meat tied to his legs so dogs would chase him, being kept underwater whilst performing various kicks and finally training in the ruined temple where he could hear the noises made by the ancient warriors.

The best scene in the film is set in the waterfront bar, where Zian gets Van Damme drunk. Van Damme shows John Travolta a few moves, whilst wearing black patent boots, trousers pulled up to his waist and a tight vest top, he dances by doing the splits, wiggling his torso and randomly clapping his hands. The soundtrack is superb and the girls he is dancing with look totally lost, which is again, all part of the brilliance. The following fight scene is astounding, with Van Damme kicking 2 guys at once in mid air, kicking a short guy ramming him with a table, into the water and slapping someone with both hands on the side of the head. Bruce Lee, eat your heart out.

I particularly enjoyed the scene with Freddy Lee in his Miami Vice style mansion and pool, full of bikini clad women.

The clothes in this film are pure high fashion, sleveless denim jackets, high waist banded trousers with black vest and skimpy brightly coloured sports shorts.

The final battle is a classic, Van Damme manages to land 5 or even 6 hits per punch onto Tong Po after nearly being shredded to death by his opponents glass clothed hands.

Again, at the end, the credits roll with another fantastic soundtrack with lyrics like "Never surrender, never say die, you've got the heart of a hero".

This film borders on a comedy, and the more seriously it takes itself, the funnier it gets. Ignore the sequels, this is the one to watch.
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