2/10
Great fun provided you like rotten Japanese monster flicks
19 July 2007
Aliens begin sending radio messages to Earth. One day, two kids are having a sleepover and they just happen to glance through a small telescope through the sky and see a UFO coming. When it lands nearby, it conveniently opens for the two precocious brats and spirits them back to another world in an orbit opposite the Earth's. Unfortunately, while this world seems high-tech, it's almost without people--having just two ladies in weird costumes and a giant monster that looks like Godzilla morphed with a kitchen knife (I am NOT exaggerating). Also unfortunate is that the monster is evil and the two ladies are intent on eating the two boys' brains (wow, that's a LONG way to go just to get takeout)! But have no fear, the boys (who appear about 10 years-old) are able to outsmart the high-tech ladies at practically every turn(?)--often understanding their machinery as well as the ladies even though they never saw it before!! Additionally, Gamera (a giant turtle-like monster who can fly from planet to planet) is able to foil the evil steak knife and make a getaway--taking the two lovable ragamuffins back home. When the Earth needs to be saved, you know you can always count on two average boys and a flying monster!

I have seen far more movies in my lifetime than any normal person and have learned to appreciate most genres. However, while I love such diverse offerings as silent film, art films, musicals, film noir, foreign films and the like, I never have been been able to understand the appeal of the crappy 1960s monster films featuring people in giant rubber dinosaur suits. They just seem very cheesy, dumb and could only be appreciated by children (okay, rabid fans, start sending me your hate mail and "not helpful" votes).

Unfortunately for me, this film is no exception to my assumption that practically all of these Japanese giant monster films stink (except perhaps the original GODZILLA). Sure, it's got the giant flame-shooting, giant-fanged flying turtle (among others), but it's also got one of the worst elements of some of these style films--"lovable kids" who love the monster and who are protected and loved back by the rubber-suited guy! Yecch! How incredibly saccharine and stupid. If you ARE going to have a giant monster, at least let him eat people and stomp on the rest! Making him good is just stupid and mushy and something that might cause indigestion!!
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