2/10
"What the *beep* is going on?"
30 September 2007
Good question.

I haven't been so confused since watching Mulholland Dr. (which by the way is an excellent movie, unlike this one). Are we really supposed to take Jason Schwartzman seriously with that comical American-French accent (see: 14ème Arrondissement in Paris, je t'aime) and the stupid thick moustache? Natalie Portman fares no better, unconvincing as a seductive vamp with a tomboyish haircut. Both actors are too young and horribly miscast here.

The dialogue is awkward beyond belief and makes no sense whatsoever. I don't understand how anyone can praise this short film since it offers pretentious "mysteries" yet explains nothing to satisfy our reluctant suspense. Until The Darjeeling Limited is released one can't really say it's good at all except stylistically. I suppose if Anderson's intention was to create hype then fine, he did his job, I will watch The Darjeeling Limited just out of curiosity to see whether he will redeem himself.

The background music is far too loud and distracting. Now is that more arty-farty symbolism, an homage to Paul Thomas Anderson or did Wes just forget to turn the sound down on his PC whilst editing? I know the exaggerated use of yellow was an intentional decision he made, but it turned out that he made a bad decision. The one shot that was beautiful and near perfect was the memorable balcony scene, in which the colours really does take your breath away. Promising, shame about the other 12 minutes.

Oh, and for the overzealous horny fanboys (for which I am one), Ms. Portman does not go nude for this film. Disappointing and unsatisfying, perhaps that's why I feel so bitter and cheated. Ah well.
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