Review of TV Hell

TV Hell (1992– )
10/10
The Descent Continues...
18 August 2008
Warning: Spoilers
Made as a response to Channel 4's 'T.V. Heaven' ( transmitted the previous year ), B.B.C.-2's 'T.V. Hell' showcased the worst of British television. I watched my video copy again recently and what struck me was how differently it would probably be made now.

For one thing, it served up whole programmes rather than piddling ( and out-of-context ) clips. We saw the pilot of the infamous Kate O'Mara '80's soap 'Triangle', and the unseen magazine programme 'Mainly For Men' ( amusingly, Alison Graham of 'The Radio Times' seemed to think the latter actually went out in 1969! ). We did not get Zoe Ball being condescending about shows she was far too young to have seen, nor Stuart Maconie and Dominik Diamond putting the boot into a decade because they did not like 'Carry On Christmas', not even a peep out of Kate Thornton. We saw the people responsible for the programmes themselves, and it was interesting to hear their views as to what they think went wrong.

Linked by Paul Merton and Angus Deayton, with witty contributions by Victor Lewis-Smith, 'T.V. Hell' was terrific stuff. 'The A-Z Of T.V. Hell' featured the infamous 'Minipops' ( children dressed to resemble pop stars of the day ), 'Churchill's People', an interminable studio-bound historical drama series based on Winston Churchill's 'A History Of The English Speaking Peoples', 'Sin On Saturday', 'The Borgias' ( its star's mastery of English was comparable to Inspector Clouseau's grasp of French ), actor John Grieve getting a fit of the giggles whilst reciting poetry on a Hogmanay show, The Sex Pistols swearing at Bill Grundy, a man jumping over eggs on 'Nationwide', 'Club X', and the 'Open Door' ( a B.B.C.-2 programme devoted to minority viewpoints ) edition starring the 'Albion Free State' which must rank as the single most boring programme ever transmitted ( yes, worse even than 'The Great Global Warming Swindle'! ).

The concept is begging to be updated. I would personally include 'The Falklands Play' ( a stunning whitewash of Thatcher ), an edition of 'O.T.T.' starring Chris Tarrant, which was like watching rugby fans on a drunken night out in Cardiff, 'Under Manning', a game show hosted by Bernard Manning ( if you can believe it ), 'Big Brother', Davina McCall on 'Question Time ( she did not have a clue what she was talking about ), Rob Brydon in 'Director's Commentary' ( a lame spoof on D.V.D. yak tracks ), 'Ruddy Hell! Its Harry & Paul!', 'Ant & Dec's Saturday Night Takeaway', the recent revival of 'Crossroads', 'Noel's House Party', Ben Elton's 'Get A Grip!', and practically everything ever broadcast on B.B.C.-3 in the name of comedy.

In 1992, the definition of bad television was those shows that took risks. In 2008, series designed to win mammoth audiences on the main channels are the ones most likely to turn out stinkers. 'Celebrity Love Island' anyone?
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