Review of Poker Run

Poker Run (2009)
4/10
Moderate suspense ruined by silly characters and absurd script
25 October 2009
Warning: Spoilers
This will contain some spoilers...

Two city dwelling lawyers want to live out some adventure in their lives, so they decide they want to buy motorcycles to attend this poker run event with their wives. They happen upon two weirdos who just happen to be selling 2 bikes on the cheap. The two weirdos are just as they seem- weird. They kidnap the guys' wives and lead the men on a chase, making them follow clues along the way to their women.

The idea is decent, but stupid characters and a dumb plot line ruin any good that could come out of this.

The two main characters aren't all that likable, and they're pretty bland. You just don't know anything about them outside of their broad stereotypical traits. The younger guy is more clean cut with short hair, the older attorney has longer hair and is a bit more on the wild side as far as looks go. Throughout the whole ordeal, we hardly care what happens to either of them or either of their wives.

The two villains are so over the top that no one with any brain cells in their head would ever buy anything from them, let alone $10, 000 motorcycles, and they sure as heck wouldn't follow these guys into the desert for a trip together. That's what ruins the script, the characters keep doing stuff that makes no sense. A hallmark of bad horror movies, of course, but better writing would have allowed us to skip this annoying hallmark and get on with a decent storyline.

There are some inventive death scenes here, if you're into that sort of thing, but ultimately they serve no purpose, as most of the characters are just so over the top that you can't take any of them seriously. A deranged family on vacation in cahoots with the villains, everyone along this route seem to be in the pockets of these two guys- but why? Money? Can they really be making that much money by selling the same bikes over and over? The plot holes are, of course, so big that it's hard to suspend disbelief for even a second.

There are some tense moments, and you get a sense of the movie SAW and a bit of Wolfcreek. It's shot well for the most part, but the audio is, from the version I watched, sub-par, at best. The acting is decent for what it is- the problem comes in with the dialog and the way some of the characters act. Again, it's just too over the top, so you end up laughing at how absurd it is when I guess you're supposed to be scared.

I'd skip this completely. It's not a terrible movie, but it's too far from good to even waste the 90 mins. The synopsis sounded interesting, but the execution falls completely flat.
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