Review of Skyrunners

Skyrunners (2009 TV Movie)
1/10
Way to NOT go, Disney!
23 January 2010
Warning: Spoilers
Way to NOT go Disney XD! Because it absolutely did not go anywhere. I absolutely did not enjoy this movie. I can't believe how much I actually did not enjoy it.

I thought the actors they cast were okay. Tyler (Joey Pollari) is a slick kid, and the job they did on his change was surprising, and not a bad idea, but it was only to make him interesting to girls! Nick (Kelly Blatz), his big brother, was also okay as an actor, playing super brain dead! But the "hot" girls - they were more like an adult's wet dream of a teenage girl than any real girl anybody of that age has ever seen or dated. You keep the sex-industry alive, Disney - good work!

The FX ware lame! Even for TV it was like seen better in movies from the 90's! And the romance bit was ultra lame - I mean, do we really have to be exposed to male-female stereotypes from the 50's with adult fantasies thrown in to cover our civilisation's fear of sex? Get real - sci-fi fantasy or not - there is nothing as demeaning to a teenager as being told that females only suck up to men with power and dexterity! Yeah, find a super power and you will get all the chicks! Be strong and manly, and you will be noticed and popular! Thanks for clinging to all the clichés of going to school!

The plot was so un-surprising that it amazed me it did not come apart at the hinges - I almost fell asleep a few times and wished I could fast forward. What makes scriptwriters believe their teenage target audience still lives in the 70's - grow up yourselves, you!

And then there's the weapon's bit - aren't you getting sick and tired of always combining masculinity and growing up with BIG GUNS - which we all know what you think stand for!

This piece of muck should be wiped from the annals of movie history, not for its low standards in FX or for its acting, but for its admission to setting the bar so low that the scriptwriters' and producers' tiny inner children are the only ones, who can really get into it. Or better ever: Used as an example of how NOT to think of teenagers of today. Get real, Disney! Shame on you!

And then there is the ending - the pre-ending with the cheering of the heroes, the winning of the girls, the waving of the American flag - and the real ending, right set up for an equally boring Skyrunners 2. Hey, there's an idea! You could totally call it "Children of yesterday" and have them travel back in time by going backwards around the Earth like Superman to totally mess with the antagonists, before they get a chance to become, what they become...

Yawn...
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