The Ape (2005)
1/10
What do "The Ape" and a real ape have in common? They both throw crap at you!
27 April 2010
Warning: Spoilers
One of the first complaints a person makes about someone who reviews a movie they don't like is to say "if you don't like, why bother reviewing it?". I can understand that viewpoint to a certain extent, but I feel compelled to write this review so that others can learn from my mistake, and avoid watching this God-awful movie.

First, I'd like to give a little background information as to why I rented this movie to begin with: I had only seen James Franco in a handful of films, but thought he was great in the ones I had seen. Such titles include his "James Dean" biopic made for TNT, and "City by the Sea", in which he co-starred with Robert De Niro. I thought since he had such a hands-on role in the production of this film, it must be good. After all, he wrote, directed and ultimately starred in this "comedy", suffice it to say, "The Ape" was clearly Franco's "baby".

This movie just goes from bad to worse, really it does. Looking back, I'm not even sure why I watched it till the end. I guess there was a part of me that was hoping it would make up for itself by the time it reached the credits. I'll spoil the suspense for those reading this review wondering if it accomplished that feat…it didn't.

"The Ape" doesn't even really feel like a real movie, but rather a homework assignment put together by a highly immature high school or college student. I guess based of his previous work, I just expected more out of Franco. In fact, "The Ape" put such a bad taste in my mouth regarding Franco that it was quite a while before I was willing to give him another chance. I still feel he's yet to recapture the magic of his earlier performances, but anything's an improvement over this steam piling of garbage.

I'm not alone in having this opinion. I also watched this movie with a few friends, who were equally confused by this movie. I felt embarrassed for having picked it out for us to watch, and they, too, thought it was one of the worst movies they'd ever seen as well.

I cannot stress enough to avoid "The Ape" at all costs, trust me, it's for your own good. If you're a fan of Franco then definitely skip it, it'll only hurt your impression of him. If you're unfamiliar with Franco's work, you won't want to start with "The Ape", that's for sure. It'll forever warp your impression of him, and I believe will adversely affect your ability to enjoy watching him in other films. The only type of person who might enjoy this, is someone who doesn't like Franco, and wants to use it as a reference point of why he's not a very good writer, director, or actor. On that level, and that level alone, it succeeds.

Is it unfair to criticize Franco so harshly for one movie? Ordinarily, yes. Every actor picks a few bad roles in their lifetime, but not just any actor chooses to write and direct themselves into such an embarrassing role.
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