Review of The Universe

The Universe (2007–2015)
The series that explains how the Big Bang eventually produced Paris Hilton and Sean Penn.
9 March 2011
(The 10/10 rating applies to the first two seasons.) "People come together, coz we're all made of stars..." Don't be a ninny like Moby, quoting a fraction of a scientific detail you overheard from a documentary program while channel-hopping during a cocaine-induced stupor (vegan cocaine, I gather...). Watch the whole thing. Because if the hairless, tone-deaf, talentless, nepotistic little turntable bunny had listened more carefully, he would have known that we're all made of supernovas. Besides, whereas it is true that most of us are made of stars, certain NY jet-set nerds are made of sewer material which I hear is made out of dung, not stars...

Astronomy and cosmology in particular have reached their Golden Age, and have been experiencing a sort of accelerated evolution, in the past decade or so, with dozens of major new discoveries. What better way to present them to science fans and utterly clueless science-illiterate masses (people like Moby and his fans) than with this slickly executed TV series. The CGI sequences are top-notch, the best scientific minds of the day have their say, the shows move at a brisk pace, and the material is sufficiently simplified so that about a fifth of all potential viewers can follow it. (A fifth: that is a LOT.) Unfortunately, the vast majority of people don't even know whether cosmology is a science or a new religious cult for Hollywood's "intelligentsia", let alone what fascinating questions, theories, and facts had been brought forward recently in this field. When one considers that various "holy books" are still top-sellers while less than 0.1% of the population has an inkling what a Big Rip is, then it's small wonder that Western Civilization has been going the way of profound dumbing-down in recent decades. Idiocracy, here we come! Madonna's latest Third-World kidnapping (sorry, adoption) is so much more interesting to the sheep than concepts such as a cosmological decade or a quasar.

I would particularly recommend TU to bog-worshipers, esoterics, the astrology-obsessed, and other witch-finders, ghost-seekers, and sasqwatch-spotters. TU might widen their horizons, make them finally aware that a real world exists out there, completely oblivious about and almost entirely unrelated to the numerous fantasy worlds humans had been concocting for eons out of pure abject fear. (Cosmic insecurity is a bitch.) Nevertheless, I am also aware that only five minutes of almost any TU episode would put off these viewer demographics from watching the rest, forever. There is no cure against Dummheit.

The first two seasons are a must, and should be checked out first. The very best: "Dark Matter/Dark Energy", "Life & Death Of A Star", "Cosmic Apocalypse", "The Outer Planets". Other superior episodes: "Cosmic Holes", "Alien Moons", "Saturn", "Jupiter", "Alien Planets", "Secrets of the Sun", "The Biggest Things In Space".

The lesser episodes are the ones dealing with space travel/colonization. Still quite interesting, but with too many of those laughable Mickey Mouse fantasy scenarios about terra-forming of alien planets and sending faster-than-light ships to other solar systems. Humanity will never move a millimeter beyond Mars, and when I say "humanity" I mean just the dozen or so luckless urine-sniffers (astronauts) who'll probably end up leaving their bones on the "red plant". I'll sooner believe that Tim Robbins comes up with a cure for the swine flu than that a successful colony will ever be established on Mars.

So what happens when a Moby particle hits an anti-Moby particle? Something wonderful.
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