Desi Boyz (2011)
1/10
Terrible
28 November 2011
This really is an abysmal film. The plot makes no sense, with John and Akshay playing male prostitutes who, we're told, don't have sex with their clients, although quite what they actually do to earn their money is never fully explained. (Why didn't the writers just make them strippers? Would they have been sued by the makers of The Full Monty?)

Akshay is involved in a nonsense story with an annoying little kid and somehow ends up studying at Oxford University. John is having woman troubles with Deepika, whose performance here is so wooden it's laughable. Yes, she may look nice, but the woman has zero star quality or charisma.

If you can get past the storyline, you will surely be shocked at the outright amateurishness of the film-making. The sound dubbing is appalling, the editing is sloppy and disjointed and the whole thing is shot without any kind of style or imagination. It also doesn't know what it wants to be, with Akshay and Deepika talking to the camera in early scenes, before this trick is apparently forgotten for the rest of the movie and the finale breaks out into typical Bollywood melodrama.

I am genuinely amazed that anyone could rate this highly. I'm pretty sure a bunch of college kids could make a more competent film.
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