1/10
Mumblecore. For Pretentious W*nkers by Pretentious W*nkers.
13 April 2013
Not exactly sure how this made it into the top 10 of my Netflix queue, but my guess is that I read an article about it getting 9 awards from various film festivals.

Two things I have concluded from this experience.

One. When any movie's plot has the slightest possibility of belonging to the "mumblecore" genre make sure to read a few critical reviews PRIOR to watching it. If the term "mumblecore" is used in any of them stay the hell away!

Two. I need to give up on movies easier. Being a huge film buff I tend to stick with a movie even when it's quite obvious in the first 15 minutes that it's absolute garbage. Somehow I keep hoping that it's going to get better. The first and last rule of "mumblecore" is that it never does.

The premise of the movie is that a twenty-something super dorky looking male who was diagnosed with a potentially fatal disease meets a beautiful twenty-something woman, they fall in love and spend a day together. Sounds like it could be interesting, but what the premise doesn't include is that these two are incredibly boring people who have absolutely nothing of consequence to say to each other. They don't talk about movies, politics, college, traveling, music, families or anything else of any value. Their whole interaction consists of completely inane subjects and they seem to be too cool to even pronounce words in a comprehensible way. At one point I tried turning on the subtitles to make out what the hell they were saying, but Netflix did not have them available for this excuse of a movie (which all hearing impaired people should be thankful for).

After watching it I found out that the main character was also one of the writers and producers. Now it made sense why the film was so unrealistic. It was his and every dorky man's fantasy. Just by showing up and existing he somehow got a very attractive girl to be so interested in him that she did all the work pursuing him. There isn't any point in the movie where he does ANYTHING to gain her interest (possibly with an exception of showing up at her art show). He mumbles about nothing and acts pathetic the entire time and we all know that this is the way to win the heart of a gorgeous young woman, don't we?

Neither one of them displays much emotion until the end and overall the film, which was shooting for sympathy, made me want his fatal decease to be infectious because neither one of these two, (or the people they hung out with, for that matter) were gonna contribute anything to the world. The only reason I can think of why this film is rated highly on Netfix is because other hipsters (read excruciatingly boring, entirely useless people who at the same time think they're better than everyone) can identify with these characters.

The pretentiousness of the film is what got me the most. The makers clearly think it's about something deep when it's about nothing at all. The whole script could've fit on a napkin ("let's have two twenty-somethings schlep around and mumble utter nonsense for a day").

I could've made a more interesting film by following a homeless guy with a camcorder.
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