Nobody Walks (2012)
2/10
A film too lazy to succeed.
13 April 2013
The first clue is the runtime of 1 hour and 22 minutes. In a time when Hollywood stretches the limits of audiences' attention spans to their fullest 3 hour seated capacity, "nobody walks" writes its epitaph with (and within) its short start to finish as it starts quickly and runs out of gas just as so. While a specific length is not a necessity, this film is ambitious in its grand plans and yet negligent on its delivery. "Nobody walks"'s quest is to tackle one of modern human life's most specific challenges: monogamy; and more importantly: the desire to stray from it; and that desire in general. Its most profound assertion is that no relationship is sacred, as not even the boundaries of our most official are safe from the powers of lust. It goes even further into suggesting that all relationships are laced with and perhaps built upon this sexual wanting. The movie is passionate about its agenda. So much so; that it beleaguers each of its eight characters with this primal condition. Unfortunately, though all the characters suffer, no one is cured, no one is diagnosed, no one can even admit they have a problem, until the film is over. Ironically, much like a failing marriage, the film cannot deal with the conflict that it has created, so it just doesn't. In the very few scenes with perfunctory attempts, it falls short; as the acting and screen writing remain under equipped to deal with the subject that "nobody walks" promises to celebrate. Functionally anorectic, the film suffers classically from a case of biting off more than it can chew, as the story neither swallows its attempt, nor takes any other bites at all. The characters take no time to introduce themselves before beginning their preconceived flaws, almost as if it wasn't supposed to happen to them at all. And just as soon as they are done, with no question or contrition, they all quit and the credits roll. Perhaps, the film, in its greatest irresponsibility, fails most disappointingly as it never explains why, some characters, though all innately feral in carnality, find vaccination in the last moments of temptation and are spared of their supposed dubious inevitability, and yet others are curiously stricken and never recover. Time management seems to be the success and failure of many films and "nobody walks", though quick in its sprint, might have been better served with a slow jog, or even a more calculated stroll.
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