Pain & Gain (2013)
2/10
Hollywood's Dumbest Director
4 October 2013
Pain & Gain is Michael Bay's attempt at a smaller, story-based film. The movie follows three dirt-poor bodybuilders who decide to live a life of crime in order to fulfil their vision of the American Dream.

Michael Bay's films tend to be action-packed, explosion-filled blockbusters with very little intelligence needed to understand them. Pain & Gain was supposed to be the film that would leave critics astonished and amazed at how he really could make a decent film. Critics were indeed astonished but not in the intended way. The film has proved that Michael Bay simply cannot make an intelligent film.

The story itself is interesting and could have made a decent movie. Three men resort to torture, violence, drugs and murder to live expensive lifestyles. The men believe they are not doing anything wrong – they are simply doing what they can to achieve their warped view of the American Dream. There have been plenty of films outlining the basic modern-day flaws of the American Dream but Pain & Gain could have taken a different angle. A bizarre decision was made to make this film into a comedy. Whether or not it is supposed to be a black comedy is anyone's guess since the plot is all over the place tonally. One minute there's some light-hearted banter, next there's an apparently hysterical scene involving a man explaining why his toe has been shot off (stealing money to fuel his Cocaine habit) then, before you know it, two people have been murdered and the laughs keep on coming...

The audience is reminded of the fact that this is indeed a true story. The film is even paused for a moment so a caption can pop up saying 'Yes, this is still a true story.' This was actually a good idea to highlight just how odd the story is and perhaps shows that Michael Bay was trying to provoke incredulity rather than laughter. He failed in both of these aspects, unfortunately. The main mistake is that the director is clearly trying to ridicule these characters for having such shallow personalities (all they want is drugs, girls and booze). However, the film is laced with half-naked women standing in provocative positions for the audience's amusement, showing that the director also likes this. Why does he ridicule the characters yet also use these aspects as gimmicks in the film?

It is difficult to gage performances in this film simply because almost every aspect of it is chaotic and messy. Mark Wahlberg is a great actor who is incredibly talented yet still makes some shocking career moves. Every actor has a bad film under their belt but he has more than a few. Luckily, he has managed to survive so far. One of his best performances is his tiny role in The Departed, which is so good he is the one you remember at the end instead of acting heavyweights like Leonardo Dicaprio and Jack Nicholson. There are only so many mistakes an actor can make however – who is looking forward to Transformers 4? Anyone? Dwayne Johnson has a promising start in Pain & Gain, playing the born-again Christian who is determined to live out his life as a good person. His character is soon dragged down to the low depths of stealing, murder and drug addiction. Surprisingly, he gives the best performance in this film. Rebel Wilson is typically able to make any one laugh as she is a very talented comedy actor but, all of her jokes fall flat here to the point where it becomes incredibly awkward for the audience. Trying to work out her purpose in this film is tricky; she gets married to one of the criminal bodybuilders but her entire dialogue is penis jokes and dirty talk. Her character isn't realistic and doesn't really serve any great purpose.

Fans of Michael Bay may enjoy this film, but they may be the only ones. It is a surprisingly boring film that appears to have taken tips from independent, smaller action films on appearance only. The film looks very good but its content is just disastrous. Pain & Gain is a shallow, boring and moronic film which hopefully will soon be forgotten. It is a poorly edited, clumsy mess filled with unnecessary slow motion, naked women for the audience and director to leer at and bizarre comical violence. All of this is included in a story that is supposed to be true. It simply does not work.
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