Cruel Jaws (1995 Video)
3/10
A shark attack flick without a shark
22 July 2014
Warning: Spoilers
Here is yet another film which begins with the titles superimposed over point-of-view shots of someone driving. making it look as though the film really is just home movies taken on holiday. It is tacky and reeks of cheapness, and it attempts to sell the location the movie was filmed in. Why do some filmmakers think that looks good?

Shark attacks occur (via the excessive use of stock footage) and three hammerheads go out on a boat to kill the creature. So much for originality. The local authorities go up into a helicopter to search the water for the shark, but spend a lot of time hovering over parking lots, before a Hulk Hogan lookalike (even balding and with a nearly white handlebar moustache) and Moron 1 and Moron 2 all get on a boat and go shark hunting, familiarly, in the third act.

This looks like a high school production, with abrupt edits, even in mundane scenes of dialogue. The filmmakers resort to the sad gimmick of shaking the camera violently, and quick-cut editing to conceal the barely-there effects, and scenes lifted from Jaws, Jaws 2, and The Last Shark, which I had just watched, so they were all clear in my mind, and easily recognisable. At least a third of this film was footage lifted from those earlier movies. Furthermore, coming from various different sources, the shark changes size from one source to the next, and even appears to be a dolphin in some scenes. The "So bad it's good" highlight is when yet another moron decides to throw gasoline on the shark, while still another moron fires a signal flare at it, thus causing an explosion which kills everyone except the shark! I watched that scene twice and laughed both times.

Film stock looks more like it was made in the late 1970s, rather than 1995, with day-for-night filming through dark blue filters.

Film's bizarre cast, and heavy use of stock footage sharks and dolphins give this an occasional "so-bad-it's-good" vibe, but the remainder of the film really drags.
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