This movie is stunningly made, has great acting and wonderful cinematography - what a shame all this talent is wasted on such a moronic story. I am struggling to find a single scene in this movie that made any sense what so ever. Everything every character does in this movie is absurd. The "story" concerns a boy who has the misfortune to have not only the most bizarre father in the world but also the most bizarre mother in the world. The father is a sociopath of the first order and the mother is just plain away with the pixies. It is unclear if the mother was raped or not, but whatever, the mother is happy enough to stay with the father for 6 weeks, then leaves when she finds she is pregnant, as you do. At their new house they find some old books, which the boy reads and becomes a genius, as you do. Despite being a genius when the boy gets older he buys a cigar store (as you do) way down an alley – clearly Marketing 101 was not included in the books he read. Despite the fact that it seems to be constantly raining, it is not apparent that the cigar shop floods every time it rains. Bizarrely, the previous owner of this shop, volunteers his contact information (as you do), so they can get his help if needed. Of course, this address is a fake. What is the point of that, apart from filling in a few minutes of the movie? Our hero is now in big trouble, he has taken out a loan to buy this ridiculous shop – obviously the Bank is as idiotic as he is. He finds to his horror that the bank is owned by his father. For some reason this is seen to be bad, although quite frankly he owes his Father a big thank you for funding such a ridiculous investment. He fronts up to the lawyers and in a spectacular travesty of optical theory is almost blinded by the reflection from the nice shiny brass name plaques. Here he meets a guy with a pronounced underbite - the point of this abnormality is a mystery - is it supposed to be funny? On his way out some English visitors arrive. Since our hero has read a couple of random English books he is a whiz at fluent spoken English in any situation. Despite the fact that the Dutch and the English seem to be communicating fine without him for some reason the boy's wondrous command of English saves the day and he is immediately given a job. Notwithstanding that his father is supposed to be a raving maniac who throws sick women into the road, he allows his son an incredibly generous repayment scheme. Despite this generosity for some reason we are supposed to think the Father is treating him badly. The son duly pays off his debt to his father and blow me down if he doesn't immediately take out another, larger loan from him, under ridiculously draconian terms. Apparently this is to prove something, but all it proves to me is that the boy is an idiot. Yet again we are supposed to think that this act of stupidity on the part of the son is another demonstration of the evilness of the Father. The son works his way up the firm and finally gets his legal degree. There are various diversions along the way. Some flossy is hanging round him in the office but because the boy has the emotional age of a 2 year old he doesn't do anything about that. This flossy invites herself back to his place (as you do) and immediately finds a door that the son had never noticed. We are introduced to a guy called Jan, who is a communist, but he does nothing in the movie apart from adding 10 minutes of padding. The bizarre father attempts to evict someone in the middle of a battle zone, as you do. For some reason a man steps out to shoot the father. For some reason he misses, from a distance of about 3 feet. A soldier then shoots this person. The boy randomly meets his father in an alley. They fight. The father throws a penknife, as you do. Evidently Rotterdam is a very small place, possibly about 100 square meters. The son and father just happen to meet in an alley. The father just happens to emerge from a canal opposite the mother's house. The son just happens to run into his flossy on the beach. He just happens to run into again later on in a park with his mother. The only scene in which we might get some insight to the Father is in a dream. Ultimately it means nothing. The father visits the mother and implies he is being mean to the son to build his character. Yes, that's right, after being brought up in poverty, being abused all his life for having no father and with a nut case of a mother for company, we wouldn't want him to be soft would we? Eventually the son leaps over a desk at his father (as you do), his father beats the living daylights out of him, and later kills himself with a penknife that would be lucky to penetrate his coat. The son is brought to the Police Station and interviewed by two of the nicest, most trustworthy men you could hope to meet. Our hero regales them with his life story, as you do in this type of situation. Eventually the son is proved innocent using forensic evidence the technology for which didn't exist in that era. I could go on, but you get the idea.
Review of Character
