1/10
I can't believe this has a 7,7 total score!
19 December 2015
Warning: Spoilers
I had been avoiding watching this for years. After Attack of the Clones, I was so angry I didn't want ANYTHING to do with Star Wars, ever again.

But people told me "oh, you missed on the best" "It's the best in the prequels", "It's not that bad". Most people said this one is the best among the prequels. Some people said this one is the best so far in the whole saga. I took that last one with a grain of salt, but still that raised my expectations a bit.

I was watching the first space battle thinking. "OK, this is cool, I see why some people were genuinely impressed". I even liked Obi Wan's dialogue up to "spring the trap". Then people started talking and acting. Or trying to act with the dialogue they had been given (and in all honestly, I feel for poor Portman and Christensen for the dialogue they had to deal with). When Portmand and Christensen are given good sentences and scenes, they actually do things right. Not on-par with the acting of the originals, but correctly. For Christensen, his chances come in the first scene with Palpatine at the theater (a bit of good acting and dialogue in the middle of the disaster), and his last scene with Obi Wan. Poor Natalie Portman has only one chance to shine, but delivers the wonderful "This is how liberty dies". Those moments of light show us that the actors are not that incompetent. It's just that no actor can endure the dialogue they have been given and look decent. Heck, even Sean Connery looked ridiculous in The Avengers. Great acting will only take you so far.

As for Ewan McGregor, I am a bit fed up of people thinking he is a good actor. He was impressive in the film Trainspotting, as the terribly selfish sometimes sociopathic guy. Because he was impressive there, people keep hiring him, and I keep seeing the same sociopathic smile in all his roles: when he was wooing Nicole Kidman in Moulin Rouge, and certainly here as Obi Wan. He is not a good actor. With the ridiculous dialogue he gets, it's even worse.

But the worst thing is the script. The dialogue is ridiculous (specially between the supposed lovers) and cheesy beyond the bearable. The character development is null. Anakin is super powerful but destroys his life because he wants to save his wife... and then kills her...

Anakin makes a mistakes (kills someone he shouldn't), and as a result, instead of apologizing, goes and kill a full kindergarten. No stupider main character ever disgraced the screen.

If you like flashy lights, you can watch the first five minutes. I enjoyed those. You might find Padme's only good line (This is how liberty ends) in youtube. You will see Hayden's best moment ("You underestimate my power") in internet memes. And the Anakin-Palpatine scene, I admit, was nice to watch.

The rest you can throw away. Specially the supposed romance. The poor kids (Natalie and Hayden) have to deal with the worst-written romance lines ever. Well, maybe those were the ones in Twilight, but I can't be sure.

"Oh, Anakin" "I can go to Naboo and prepare the baby's room" (I almost puked at listening to this one). "You are breaking my heart". Seriously?

OK, I admit the movie does not deserve a 1. That should go for the likes of Dragonball Evolution. As a standalone film, I would give it a four. As a part of Star Wars, considering incoherences with the previous movies and everything it breaks, it should have a 3. However, the vast amount of people who gave this a ten just flabbergasted me. The rating is way too artificially inflated. If the movie in general had a five or a six, I would give it its proper rating (3). But, 7,7 as of December 2015? No way. Someone may actually believe it and no, really.

I will keep on praying for Disney to remake the prequels. There is so much material for improvement here.
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