Red Christmas (I) (2016)
2/10
WTF did I just watch?
3 December 2018
Warning: Spoilers
Ummmmmm, wut?

Bored on a Sunday, few weeks before Christmas, plus I love horror movies, so why not try this? WHY, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WHY?

Firstly, I don't understand how movies like this get funding? Who pays for this? Wouldn't that budget be better spent on like, dog food at SPCA's or something?

Woman gets abortion, but somehow not? Same abortion clinic gets bombed, supposed aborted baby still survives. OK. Sure. Flash forward 20 years, supposed aborted/bombing baby is back dressed as the mummy/grim reaper combo. How he finds his mother in her secluded ranch home in the middle of Australia, yet has never heard of a present? WHO KNOWS.

They invite in the Grim Bombed Mummy Aborted Baby, even though his creep factor is through the roof, give him a jar of peanuts and then kick him out for starting to read a letter. What else is there for him to do, other than murder the whole family!!! Since when can you split someone completely and cleanly in half with an ax? Please, someone let me know. Women argue with accents, over pie and what not, ya know, real deep stuff. Grim Bombed Mummy Aborted Baby then kills every single person, but not before the mom is able to simultaneously able to hang herself/cut GBMAB in half.

THE END. No, seriously. That's the end. Please don't watch this, please? I beg of you.
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