"We Will Destroy The Living!"...
14 September 2019
Warning: Spoilers
GARDEN OF THE DEAD isn't a typical prison movie. During a chow break, an inmate (aka: a guy in a blue work shirt with a number scrawled on it in felt-tip pen) inhales some gas from a 55-gallon drum of formaldehyde. Other cons soon join in, which was the fad in prisons in the early 1970's.

At first, all is euphoric joy, as the felons discuss their latest escape plans. Alas, breathing in poison isn't as wonderful as it appears! After making good their escape, the convicts are quickly killed by the glove-wearing warden (aka: a man who looks like a TV evangelist with a hand rash) and his posse.

Unceremoniously buried, the dead begin to rise from their suspiciously shallow graves, and make their way back to the prison (aka: some old farmyard). The rest is a mildly amusing, mostly absurd rampage of groaning gas-zombies.

Made entirely of moldy cheddar, this movie will most likely make viewers want to pickle their own heads in formaldehyde before it's over! Blessedly short, at an hour in length, it's over before too much cranial scorching can set in, though a post-viewing lobotomy is recommended...
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