oscaralbert Review of The Purple Gang

The Purple Gang (1959)

"Only the Civic Awareness of the American Public . . . "

[6/10 · 6 December 2019]

" . . . can bring an end to Rat Pack Terrorism," cautions the voiceover guy to conclude THE PURPLE GANG. Re-released by the always eponymous Warner Bros., this flick is carefully crafted to warn our USA Homeland about the nefarious Canadian miscreants such as the "Olson Brothers" who smuggle contraband including booze, hookers, and dope across our Open Northern Border. When the Olson Gang hooks up with the local titular "rat pack," all bets are off. No one is safe. Perverse sexual predator thugs venture North from the so-called Motor City into the formerly bucolic echelons of Macomb and Oakland Counties to assault pregnant housewives, before compelling them to jump to their deaths from bedroom windows--slaying BOTH the expectant moms and their pending bundles of joy! Certainly any POTUS with a brain in his head could not view THE PURPLE GANG without giving America's vulnerable NORTHERN border the highest, top priority when and if walls are actually being built. Since THE PURPLE GANG's heyday, Canadian predators have reduced Motown's population by two-thirds, slicing and dicing the USA's fourth largest city down to the size of Peoria or Kalamazoo! Something must be done ASAP, before the last American living south of Eight Mile Road turns off the lights in Detroit! You owe it to your muscle car to watch THE PURPLE GANG, and then demand that the White House construct an 80-foot high Great Wall along the Detroit River, and the rest of America's Achilles Heel to the North!