5/10
Essential viewing for fans of z-grade schlock.
16 January 2021
A race of human-like aliens (including obligatory hot female, Tanna, played by Joanna Lee) try to make contact with Earth, but are repeatedly rebuffed, leaving them no choice but to put 'Plan 9' into operation: reanimate the dead and take control of the planet by force!

Directed by Ed Wood, who had no idea just how terrible a film-maker he was, this '50s cult classic gets it wrong in all the right ways, with not a shred of irony and no sign of tongue-in-cheek. Horror star Bela Lugosi died halfway through filming, probably of acute embarrassment, but Wood didn't let that inconvenience stop him - he just used a stand-in who covered his face with a cape for the rest of the film.

The cheapness of the production is evident in almost every scene, from the hilarious airplane cockpit comprising of a curtain, two chairs and some plywood controls, to the wobbly 'hubcap' flying saucers suspended on pieces of string, to the alien's spaceship which features velvet curtains and ladders inside and out. Stock footage of military airplanes is used to pad out the run-time.

It's hard to say who is the worst performer: Tor Johnson and Vampira are terrible as reanimated bodies under the control of the aliens, but at least they're supposed to be lifeless; the rest of the cast has no such excuse. For your consideration: Gregory Walcott as 'fists first, talk later' pilot Jeff Trent, weird soothsayer Criswell as the narrator, and Duke Moore as the cop who scratches his head with the barrel of his gun and delivers this priceless piece of dialogue - 'One thing's sure... Inspector Clay's dead. Murdered. And somebody's responsible.'

Plan 9 From Outer Space is often cited as the worst film of all time, and, from a technical standpoint, it's definitely a strong contender for the title, suffering from a terrible script, poor acting, ham-fisted direction and terrible special effects. In terms of entertainment value, however, it is far from it: the sheer shoddiness of the whole thing makes it great midnight movie viewing for fans of z-grade sci-fi.
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