Greetings And Salutations, and welcome to my review of Blood Theatre; here's the breakdown of my ratings:
Story: 0.25 Direction: 0.50 Pace: 0.00 Acting: 0.50 Enjoyment: 0.50
TOTAL: 1.75 out of 10.00
The only thing that drew me to this title was the synopsis. It offered such possibilities, of which none emerged.
And the blame lays at the feet of one man - Rick Sloane. Being a one-man band, both writer and director, you have no one else to blame for the movie's outcome. The synopsis basically places a slasher in an abandoned theatre. After a cinema multiplex chain buys the building and refurbishes the property, the slasher picks up where they left off. Blood Theatre should have been a literal Bloody Theatre. However, there's very little blood flowing. And there's even less story disclosed, either. Most blank space is left blank: People wander about aimlessly and say nothing in particular. And that leads to some of the worst and most mindless dialogue in a script. It's horrendous. Sloane should've hired the proverbial typing monkeys. At least then, the story might've possessed an ounce of interest for the audience. But it does have some lure; the opening sequence leading up to the theatre's closure isn't too terrible. Even the characters are more believable and credible than the ones who follow. The guys and galls in the opening section are nearly two-dimensional. And forget about the comedy element. Sloane can't write a semi-decent character or situation: so how's he to fare with humour? Crassly, immaturely, and unfunnily, that's how.
Sloane then gets worse behind the camera. And like the story, the opening sequence is his best efforts on display. But it all drops off a cliff into a neverending hole after that. The camerawork goes to simple point and shoot, and they shoot everything. The movie could have done with some serious editing work to remove all the dead air and superfluous moments - of which there are way too many. These overly long segments make the picture's tempo too languid and help the audience hit their boredom wall quickly. And since his timing is way out for the entirety of the non-funny scenes, how could he hope to add his humourous ones successfully? Simply: He couldn't.
At least there was a glimmer of light in the cast, for it contained Mary Woronov and David Millbern. These two performers add a smidgen of immersion for the viewers. Sadly, they are not on the screen too long, and the poor sods have to cope with the dire script and discourse. There's a pleasant performance from the actress in the theatre booth at the movie's beginning - and it's a shame she didn't get a part in the main body of the film, as I'm sure she could have breathed life into one of the walking dead principal actresses roles.
Blood Theatre is a picture you never need to see because no good will come from it. I watched this movie, so you don't have to - please don't let my torment be in vain.
Now you have your ticket for the main show, please take your seat and peruse my IMDb list - Killer Thriller Chillers to see where I ranked Blood Theatre. Better yet, you can find something much more entertaining to tickle your enjoyment senses.
Take Care & Stay Well.
Story: 0.25 Direction: 0.50 Pace: 0.00 Acting: 0.50 Enjoyment: 0.50
TOTAL: 1.75 out of 10.00
The only thing that drew me to this title was the synopsis. It offered such possibilities, of which none emerged.
And the blame lays at the feet of one man - Rick Sloane. Being a one-man band, both writer and director, you have no one else to blame for the movie's outcome. The synopsis basically places a slasher in an abandoned theatre. After a cinema multiplex chain buys the building and refurbishes the property, the slasher picks up where they left off. Blood Theatre should have been a literal Bloody Theatre. However, there's very little blood flowing. And there's even less story disclosed, either. Most blank space is left blank: People wander about aimlessly and say nothing in particular. And that leads to some of the worst and most mindless dialogue in a script. It's horrendous. Sloane should've hired the proverbial typing monkeys. At least then, the story might've possessed an ounce of interest for the audience. But it does have some lure; the opening sequence leading up to the theatre's closure isn't too terrible. Even the characters are more believable and credible than the ones who follow. The guys and galls in the opening section are nearly two-dimensional. And forget about the comedy element. Sloane can't write a semi-decent character or situation: so how's he to fare with humour? Crassly, immaturely, and unfunnily, that's how.
Sloane then gets worse behind the camera. And like the story, the opening sequence is his best efforts on display. But it all drops off a cliff into a neverending hole after that. The camerawork goes to simple point and shoot, and they shoot everything. The movie could have done with some serious editing work to remove all the dead air and superfluous moments - of which there are way too many. These overly long segments make the picture's tempo too languid and help the audience hit their boredom wall quickly. And since his timing is way out for the entirety of the non-funny scenes, how could he hope to add his humourous ones successfully? Simply: He couldn't.
At least there was a glimmer of light in the cast, for it contained Mary Woronov and David Millbern. These two performers add a smidgen of immersion for the viewers. Sadly, they are not on the screen too long, and the poor sods have to cope with the dire script and discourse. There's a pleasant performance from the actress in the theatre booth at the movie's beginning - and it's a shame she didn't get a part in the main body of the film, as I'm sure she could have breathed life into one of the walking dead principal actresses roles.
Blood Theatre is a picture you never need to see because no good will come from it. I watched this movie, so you don't have to - please don't let my torment be in vain.
Now you have your ticket for the main show, please take your seat and peruse my IMDb list - Killer Thriller Chillers to see where I ranked Blood Theatre. Better yet, you can find something much more entertaining to tickle your enjoyment senses.
Take Care & Stay Well.