Mortality is something all living beings have to face at some point in their lives, especially the human race as our lives are usually cut short by either our own stupidity or someone else's. What makes it harder is deciding what will happen to those you leave behind when you make your exit from this world, and if you're a mom or a dad, you'll want someone you trust to gain custody of your child. This is not an easy decision for anybody to make and often times the wrong decision can lead to dissention in the ranks, could possibly even break up the family. Well, let's see what happens when Mike and Gloria Stivic make the wrong decision about who would raise Joey if they both died. Knowing them, it's the only decision they could make. So this classic All in the Family episode opens on baby Joey's first birthday, and as Gloria was preparing the cheap bargain bin toys she got for him, Mike staggers in the front door, looking disheveled and bruised. "Did you get mugged again?" Gloria asked, sounding unphased, and yet, when Mike does get mugged in Season 8, she screams bloody murder. No, Mike wasn't really mugged, the dumbass just fell on the subway tracks and was nearly hit by the train. He was rescued in time, but one of his rescuers stole his wallet. Wah-wah-wah. Anyway, as the Meathead was moments from death, he wondered what would've happened if Gloria had been with him, and who would raise Joey? When she suggests her parents, Mike balks at the idea, not wanting Joey to grow up like Archie, and instead suggests his roster of hippie friends. Yeah, much better alternatives. Mike doesn't want Joey to be alone with Archie, so Gloria jokes that they should kill him. Man, what is her problem? Her husband almost died, they're discussing the subject of mortality, and she jokes about killing someone. Stupid woman. Thankfully at that moment, Edith and Archie come through the door with little Joey. Despite what Meathead thinks, they're both wonderful with the baby and maybe he was starting to change his mind, until Grandpa Archie presents Joey's gift: a toy gun... that's bigger than he is. Gloria plans to give Joey a doll, but when Archie accidentally decapitates it, Mike intentionally breaks the toy gun, and then it all comes out: he says then and there that if something happened to them, Joey would go to their friends, Al and Trudy. Naturally, the Bunkers are stunned at this news, and even though she usually has something to say for everything, Gloria stays silent, showing that she supports Mike's decision. Really? Just cause of two broken toys? Mike later says it's because of Archie's racist, xenophobic points of view, and although Gloria pointed out that she didn't turn out that way, he says it was because Edith was there, and what if something happened to her? Well, since a damper had been put on that poor baby's birthday, Archie and Edith leave, and I don't blame them one bit. In fact, I'm starting to really wish that train had hit Mike.
Deciding to go through with his bonehead idea, Mike calls up Al, whom we met a few episodes back, to tell him they're going to inherit a baby whether they like it or not, but the call is cut short when Edith comes back, still very hurt over the Stivics' assumption that she and Archie were not fit to raise Joey. Gloria keeps kidding herself by telling her mom that child rearing is a big responsibility, as if she didn't know, and that it gets harder in older years. Yeah, she can see right through you, you bimbo, and I'm sure raising a kid like you must have been hell on earth for them. Mike reveals his decision was influenced by Archie, leading Edith to point out just how loving of a grandfather he is, and then the aforementioned Mr. Bunker comes into the house, and an argument about wills ensues. Archie states his intention that regardless of what the will says, he would take Joey anyway, despite Mike pointing out the legalities. Meathead, just... shut up. Well, hopefully this makes them realize just how selfish and inconsiderate they were in making this decision. Incidentally, it seemed to be entirely Mike's idea on not willing Joey to his grandparents, and Gloria never said anything for or against it, at least in the presence of her own parents. Just shows where her loyalties lie. Oh, but get a load of this: even after the Bunkers leave the house, heartbroken, and Gloria is blowing like a geyser, Mike still sticks by his principles that Al would be a better guardian than Archie... until Gloria points out that Al made a pass at her and groped her once, and that changes everything. Good that you held that information from him, huh, Gloria? I hate both of these characters, but I'll get into that later. Anyway, what to do now about Joey's guardianship? Al the womanizer is obviously out, and Mike still thinks of Archie as an unfit bigot, and then Gloria hits upon a "brilliant" idea. You know what it is? They decide not to die. Yep, that's right, she says they should make an "anti-dying pact" and never die. I wish I was kidding, but she actually says that, and she calls up Archie to tell him of the idea, and he like everyone else thinks it's stupid, however Edith is confident that she and Archie will be named guardians anyway, so the matter is quietly taken care of. On that note, Archie wants to salvage what's left of Joey's birthday and go buy him another toy gun.
So that was "Mike and Gloria's Will", and, well, it's a well acted episode, the cast does their usual terrific job, the writing is good, the directing, all of those pieces are good, and this is not a bad episode, but it is insanely frustrating! I guess a discussion about who would raise your kids in the event of your death is a frustrating subject as you want to make sure you make the right decision, but to handle it the way Mike and Gloria did was terrible. These are two of the most selfish people I've ever seen, and they are both profoundly stupid! The way they treated Archie and Edith, the way Mike makes all the decisions without consulting Gloria, and the way she doesn't speak up on her parents' behalf in their presence really shows what truly awful people they are. They were so much better when they lived with the Bunkers, but moving out on their own turned them into creeps. I despise Mike and Gloria centered episodes after Season 6, because of how these characters are portrayed, and nowhere is that better put on display than in this episode. Archie and Edith aren't perfect, nobody is, but for someone Joey's age, it would make sense to leave them with someone familiar, instead of two strangers. As far as them deciding not to die, well, someone as dumb as Mike who falls on subway tracks, I'd say he isn't long for this world. In closing, I will say that I do recommend "Mike and Gloria's Will", but prepare yourself for what awful human beings they are. I liked them when they lived with Archie and Edith, but I loathe them now that they moved out, and they only get worse from here.
Deciding to go through with his bonehead idea, Mike calls up Al, whom we met a few episodes back, to tell him they're going to inherit a baby whether they like it or not, but the call is cut short when Edith comes back, still very hurt over the Stivics' assumption that she and Archie were not fit to raise Joey. Gloria keeps kidding herself by telling her mom that child rearing is a big responsibility, as if she didn't know, and that it gets harder in older years. Yeah, she can see right through you, you bimbo, and I'm sure raising a kid like you must have been hell on earth for them. Mike reveals his decision was influenced by Archie, leading Edith to point out just how loving of a grandfather he is, and then the aforementioned Mr. Bunker comes into the house, and an argument about wills ensues. Archie states his intention that regardless of what the will says, he would take Joey anyway, despite Mike pointing out the legalities. Meathead, just... shut up. Well, hopefully this makes them realize just how selfish and inconsiderate they were in making this decision. Incidentally, it seemed to be entirely Mike's idea on not willing Joey to his grandparents, and Gloria never said anything for or against it, at least in the presence of her own parents. Just shows where her loyalties lie. Oh, but get a load of this: even after the Bunkers leave the house, heartbroken, and Gloria is blowing like a geyser, Mike still sticks by his principles that Al would be a better guardian than Archie... until Gloria points out that Al made a pass at her and groped her once, and that changes everything. Good that you held that information from him, huh, Gloria? I hate both of these characters, but I'll get into that later. Anyway, what to do now about Joey's guardianship? Al the womanizer is obviously out, and Mike still thinks of Archie as an unfit bigot, and then Gloria hits upon a "brilliant" idea. You know what it is? They decide not to die. Yep, that's right, she says they should make an "anti-dying pact" and never die. I wish I was kidding, but she actually says that, and she calls up Archie to tell him of the idea, and he like everyone else thinks it's stupid, however Edith is confident that she and Archie will be named guardians anyway, so the matter is quietly taken care of. On that note, Archie wants to salvage what's left of Joey's birthday and go buy him another toy gun.
So that was "Mike and Gloria's Will", and, well, it's a well acted episode, the cast does their usual terrific job, the writing is good, the directing, all of those pieces are good, and this is not a bad episode, but it is insanely frustrating! I guess a discussion about who would raise your kids in the event of your death is a frustrating subject as you want to make sure you make the right decision, but to handle it the way Mike and Gloria did was terrible. These are two of the most selfish people I've ever seen, and they are both profoundly stupid! The way they treated Archie and Edith, the way Mike makes all the decisions without consulting Gloria, and the way she doesn't speak up on her parents' behalf in their presence really shows what truly awful people they are. They were so much better when they lived with the Bunkers, but moving out on their own turned them into creeps. I despise Mike and Gloria centered episodes after Season 6, because of how these characters are portrayed, and nowhere is that better put on display than in this episode. Archie and Edith aren't perfect, nobody is, but for someone Joey's age, it would make sense to leave them with someone familiar, instead of two strangers. As far as them deciding not to die, well, someone as dumb as Mike who falls on subway tracks, I'd say he isn't long for this world. In closing, I will say that I do recommend "Mike and Gloria's Will", but prepare yourself for what awful human beings they are. I liked them when they lived with Archie and Edith, but I loathe them now that they moved out, and they only get worse from here.