Hawkeye returns from R&R to find out Trapper has been discharged. He rushes to the airport to say goodbye but misses him. But it gives him an opportunity to welcome Trapper's replacement, B.J., to Korea.
It's a bitterly cold night, and Hawkeye and B.J. are stuck with the overnight shift and a roomful of unruly patients. In the meantime, Margaret tells Frank that she keeps all his love letters--so he ransacks her tent to get them back.
Due to a clerical error, Hawkeye has been declared dead. He goes crazy wondering how his dad is taking the news but the phone lines are tied up due to Eisenhower's impending visit.
Hawkeye and B.J. agree to help a colleague trying to start a Korean restaurant when he gets home. But Frank refuses to cooperate--until he is involved in an ridiculous tank accident.
After their bus breaks down in the middle of nowhere on the way back from a medical convention, Hawkeye, B.J., Colonel Potter, Frank and Radar find themselves stranded.
Colonel Potter writes his anniversary letter to his wife. Meanwhile, Frank and Margaret try to find the perfect anniversary gift, only to be outdone by Radar.
The 4077th takes in Nurse Cratty's Korean orphans during a shelling attack, including a pregnant girl with a bullet wound. But Frank accuses one of the orphans of stealing his newly (and dubiously) awarded Purple Heart.
The latest group of casualties includes a bomber pilot who claims he's Jesus Christ. Frank and Margaret think he's faking battle fatigue in order to get a discharge, and they bring in Colonel Flagg to help expose him.
Hawkeye saves the life of a colonel who wants him reprimanded for disrespect. B.J. tries to save the marriage of a friend who found out his wife is cheating on him, and Frank is paranoid that all Koreans are hiding or burying bombs.
The 4077th introduces a "soldier of the month" award, which includes a week of R&R in Tokyo, and Klinger and Radar go all out to win the honor. Frank is supposed to choose the winner, but he contracts a rare fever.
Colonel Potter finds out that he's about to become a grandfather, and Major Burns learns that his wife knows about his affair with Margaret--and wants a divorce.
What seems to be a simple request to get tomato juice for Colonel Potter becomes a ridiculous, complicated ordeal when Major Burns asks for something in return.
Hawkeye and B.J. place a toe tag on a passed-out Frank as part of a drunken practical joke. But the joke backfires on them when he is accidentally shipped out to the front lines.
Hawkeye Pierce, going solo, has an accident with a Jeep, and is rescued by a South Korean family. To prevent himself from succumbing to a concussion, Hawkeye begins talking endlessly to the family, who can't understand a word he's saying.
Hawkeye has impotency problems, Frank auctions off the 4077th's garbage, and Radar becomes distraught after a patient he has taken special interest in dies.
A chopper pilot with diabetes dead set on bringing in the most wounded from the front to be the 'Chopper Pilot of the Year' continues flying against the docs' orders.
A nurse that Hawkeye used to live with and never got over arrives at the 4077th. And Hawkeye's heartbreak is only intensified when he learns that she is now married.