I saw this movie at an "arts" festival. Honestly, I sometimes appreciate art films, although my wife and I often disagree as to whether a particular "arts" film is good or bad. On this one we were agreed: the worst movie we've ever seen. I don't know where to start. It's about 90 minutes long. There is one ten-minute "scene" where the camera is pointed, hand-held, at a sequence of unrelated STILL pictures, which jiggle around the screen while the audio trolls on about Greek Gods on Mount Olympus. And no, the still pictures being shot with a movie camera have nothing at all to do with Greek Gods or mountains. One of the still pictures (I kid you not!) depicts what appears to be two groups participating in a tug-of-war in an indoor gym. I forget what the other stills depicted. In another "scene" we are treated to footage of a bad rehearsal of some choreographic dance, sometimes with related audio, sometimes not. That "scene" went on for a torturous 20 minutes or so. Another "scene" depicts a very confused and disconnected story about a love quadrilateral: two guys and two girls who keep switching partners in some weird, disconnected way, all acted out in a single room with hardwood floors, one chair and one mattress on the floor, and nothing on the walls. One sub-scene of this depicts one of the men with two of the women. The man stands in the middle of the two women, and alternately turns from one to the other. The women respond by either turning towards him or away from him, as the "narrator" mentions how on that day she was annoyed at his infidelity, and on another day she couldn't live without him. Similarly bad scenes occur between the two women and the other man. This was about the best part in the movie, but it still rivals an Ed Wood film in terms of monstrous badness.
"Plan 9 from Outer Space", by Ed Wood, was once voted the worst movie of all time. I've seen "Plan 9", and it, at least, fell into the category of "so bad it's good". It was so bad that it was funny. This movie, however, was so bad it was painful. Several times my wife pleaded with me to walk out of the theater. At first I was just mesmerized, wondering if it would somehow all fall into place at the end. It didn't. In fact, the movie ended with 35 shots of the various actors in frozen poses, trying very hard not to move. Each of these 35 scenes --- THIRTY-FIVE!!! --- lasted about 20 seconds, for a total of another 12 minutes of torturous boredom. Eventually I just had to stay and express my opinion of how bad it was. Unfortunately I was almost alone by that time because almost everybody else had already had the good sense to walk out. And yes, I expressed the opinion to the film-maker herself, but she shrugged me off by saying, "Well, you're entitled to your opinion, but if you were familiar with the history of cinema, then ... (blah blah blah)." Lady, I don't need to know anything about the history of cinema to be able to call a spade a spade.
A complete waste of time. Trash. Tripe. Inane. Vacuous. Disconnected. Absolutely no redeeming qualities - NONE.
"Plan 9 from Outer Space", by Ed Wood, was once voted the worst movie of all time. I've seen "Plan 9", and it, at least, fell into the category of "so bad it's good". It was so bad that it was funny. This movie, however, was so bad it was painful. Several times my wife pleaded with me to walk out of the theater. At first I was just mesmerized, wondering if it would somehow all fall into place at the end. It didn't. In fact, the movie ended with 35 shots of the various actors in frozen poses, trying very hard not to move. Each of these 35 scenes --- THIRTY-FIVE!!! --- lasted about 20 seconds, for a total of another 12 minutes of torturous boredom. Eventually I just had to stay and express my opinion of how bad it was. Unfortunately I was almost alone by that time because almost everybody else had already had the good sense to walk out. And yes, I expressed the opinion to the film-maker herself, but she shrugged me off by saying, "Well, you're entitled to your opinion, but if you were familiar with the history of cinema, then ... (blah blah blah)." Lady, I don't need to know anything about the history of cinema to be able to call a spade a spade.
A complete waste of time. Trash. Tripe. Inane. Vacuous. Disconnected. Absolutely no redeeming qualities - NONE.