Tales from the Crypt (TV Series)

Dead Right (1990)

Jeffrey Tambor: Charlie Marno

Photos 

Quotes 

• Charlie Marno : I know I'm a... I'm a little overweight...

  Cathy Marno : A little overweight? Yeah, and Hitler was a little anti-Semitic. And Eisenhower's a little bald. And the Pope's a little Catholic.

• Charlie Marno : I love married life.

  Cathy Marno : It's rich, isn't it?

• Charlie Marno : If I can't have you... nobody can!

• Cathy Marno : Say, Charlie...

  Charlie Marno : What?

  Cathy Marno : Have you heard from your uncle? Y'know, the rich one, at the factory, yeah?

  Charlie Marno : Nah, why would I hear from him? He's out West, with his family.

  Cathy Marno : Family? Goddamnit, Charlie! Why didn't you tell me he had family?

  Charlie Marno : What's the big deal?

  Cathy Marno : Big deal? Are you nuts? Are you outta your fuckin' mind? You crazy? What's the big deal? It's only my goddamn fuckin' future, that's all! Shit!

• Charlie Marno : Hey! Are you playing hard to get?

  Cathy Marno : No. Just try impossible to get.

• Charlie Marno : Actually, I'm, I'm pretty light on my feet.

  Cathy Marno : Yeah? I wish you were light on my feet.

  Charlie Marno : Sorry?

  Cathy Marno : I said you're such a delight to meet.

• Charlie Marno : Cathy, is that you?

  Cathy Marno : Yes it is! You fat, disgusting slob!

• Cathy Marno : Madame Vorma was wrong. I got the money and you didn't. I've had my last dose of Charlie Marno! And thank god!

  Charlie Marno : What are you talking about?

  Cathy Marno : I'm talkin' about you, you creep! I don't need you anymore. I'm movin' out! No more smellin' that stinkin' sewer you call a body! I'm outta here. Thanks for 3 months of nausea.

• Charlie Marno : Look, uh, I know you don't want to go out with me. But, uh, me, see, I'm the kind of guy... I just, uh, I just don't take no for an answer.

  Cathy Marno : Then how about never. Like no way. Not for all the money in the world.

  Charlie Marno : See, the thing is, you move me baby.

  Cathy Marno : Get serious. Allied Van Lines couldn't move you.

• Charlie Marno : Cathy, I love Chinese food, except, for one thing...

  Cathy Marno : You feel like eating again 20 minutes later?

  Charlie Marno : [roars with laughter]  How did you know that?