Leave It to Beaver (TV Series)

Beaver's Birthday (1961)

Jerry Mathers: The Beaver

Photos 

Quotes 

• Gilbert Bates : Hey, look. Someone must have shoved it under your door.

  Theodore Cleaver : What is it?

  Gilbert Bates : It says, "Mr Theodore Cleaver".

  Theodore Cleaver : Hey, that's me! It says they delivered a registered letter, but there was nobody here, so they took it back to the Post Office and we're s'posed to go get it.

  Gilbert Bates : Hmm, must be a mistake. No kid ever got a registered letter.

  Theodore Cleaver : Well, it's gotta be for me. I'm the only Theodore Cleaver in the whole house.

  Gilbert Bates : Hey, maybe it's a present. Let's go down to the Post Office and see what it is.

  Theodore Cleaver : Okay. I just hope they don't hit us or anything.

• Theodore Cleaver : [Beaver is old enough to make his own decisions about his birthday money, but tells a lie anyway after Gilbert convinces him to buy a model race car, not save the unexpected $10 he gets from Uncle Billy]  Well, what should I do about the car, Dad?

  Ward Cleaver : Well, what do you think you should do?

  Theodore Cleaver : You mean I've got to make my own decision about that, too?

  Ward Cleaver : I think you should.

  Theodore Cleaver : Well, I think I oughta keep the car, on accounta I used it, but I'm gonna tell Mom I'm sorry for lyin' to her, and I think I oughta come home from school every day early for a whole week, without havin' any fun.

  Ward Cleaver : Fine, Beaver. I have just one suggestion to make.

  Theodore Cleaver : Oh, yes sir?

  Ward Cleaver : I think you should tell Gilbert that his idea didn't work.

  Theodore Cleaver : [with a hint of anger]  Oh, I'm gonna tell him all right, Dad. And I think I'll tell him while I'm sittin' on him!

• Theodore Cleaver : [Beaver and Gilbert go to the Post Office]  I have a notice for a registered letter.

  The Postal Clerk : [reading the notice]  "Registered mail, Mr Theodore Cleaver." Is that your father?

  Theodore Cleaver : Oh no, sir. That's me.

  Gilbert Bates : He doesn't look like a "Mister", but that's him!

  The Postal Clerk : Well, Mr Theodore Cleaver, do you, uh, have any identification?

  Theodore Cleaver : Identification?

  The Postal Clerk : Something, uh, with your name on it.

  Theodore Cleaver : Oh, just my underwear. My Mom sewed it on when I went to camp.