The Cleveland Show (TV Series)

Da Doggone Daddy-Daughter Dinner Dance (2009)

Mike Henry: Cleveland Brown, Rallo Tubbs

Quotes 

• Cleveland Brown : [sadly]  I'm glad you're all here, please sit down.

  [the family is seated in front of Cleveland] 

  Cleveland Brown : I'm not sure how to tell ya'll this, so I'm just gonna say it. The other night... Meadowlark Lemon was killed.

  Rallo Tubbs : WHAT?

  Roberta Tubbs : OH MY GOD! WHAT HAPPENED?

  Cleveland Brown : Well, as I was backing out of the driveway to get the Baskin Robbins ice cream cake, which all later enjoyed, veury much, I accidently drove over his head with both my left rear tire and then, my left front tire. Curious, I stepped out of my vehicle and saw his mangled lifeless body on the driveway, in a smeared pool of his own blood.

  Cleveland Brown : Ugg, and now the hard part. I had no idea in the hours that followed, Lester and his family would eat Meadowlark Lemon.

  [Family stare in surprise horror] 

  Cleveland Brown : That's right they ate your dog.

  [in a more cheerful uplifted tone, meaning to change the subject] 

  Cleveland Brown : Okay, so Rallo, go throw the dog food out, we have no use for it now. That'll make room for a new recycling bin the kitchen. Hooray, hooray for the Browns and Tubbses.

• Cleveland Brown : [to his buddy at the broken stool]  So, all day, I was searching for a dog, that I know was dead. I don't know what to tell these kids.

  Lester Krinklesac : Hey if it had help, tell'em it was delicious.

  Cleveland Brown : WHAT?

  Lester Krinklesac : Tasted a lot like kittens.

  Cleveland Brown : YOU ATE THE DOG?

  Holt Richter : I ate a dog once, I think her name was Betsy. Met her tail gaining, arena football, season tickets. She had bacne, woke up, she was peeing in the corner of my room.

  Lester Krinklesac : Was she Chinese or Asian?

  Holt Richter : Partly, ugh know what she might have been Hawian.

• Cleveland Brown : [after successfully getting Roberta to be her date for the Daddy-Daughter dinner dance, off to get a Baskin Robin's ice cream cake] 

  [to his rearview mirror reflection] 

  Cleveland Brown : Hey new step-daddy, you are doing a great job. Now, go get that cake.

  [as Cleveland slowly backs out the car, his left rear tire hits something, stops for 3 seconds, back out again but now his left front tire hits the bump as well. Cleveland steps out of the car an looks at the ground on his left] 

  Cleveland Brown : WHAT THE...

  [Find the corpse of Meadowlark Lemon, the family dog, lying dead at the spot where Cleveland hit him] 

  Cleveland Brown : I'M SO SORRY MEADOWLARK LEMON!

  Lester Krinklesac : Why you'd kill the dog? Wouldn't stop barking, huh.

  Cleveland Brown : No Lester, it was an accident. We gotta keep this a secret, or the kids will hate me, forever.

  Lester Krinklesac : [Lifts dog leg and looks at its crutch]  Since there's no sign of sexual abuse, I'll go ahead and get rid of him for ya.Since there's no sign of sexual abuse

  [drags the dog to his home by the leg] 

  Lester Krinklesac : [as he walk through the door, to his wife]  Kendra, hope you in the mood for Chinese food.

  Kendra Krinklesac : You read my stomach.