Supernatural (TV Series)

Man's Best Friend with Benefits (2013)

Jensen Ackles: Dean Winchester

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sam Winchester : [Talking about what he thinks is a stray dog that wandered into their motel room]  Okay. Before you get pissed off, look, I-I just want you to know this isn't my fault. She just showed up at the door, okay? Didn't track in any mud. Just wanted her belly scratched. I-I figured maybe she could stay tonight, and we'd try and find her a home tomorrow.

  [Opens door, the "dog" has turned into a beautiful woman] 

  Dean Winchester : ...She can stay the night.

• Portia : James is a cop with a spotless record. He's used his skills for nothing but good. So why don't you lose the ignorant bigotry for maybe two seconds and give him a shot?

  Dean Winchester : That was incredibly hot.

  [Portia scoffs, looks at Sam] 

  Sam Winchester : [Reluctantly]  It was pretty hot.

• Drexyl : There is, however, a lot of chatter about our James.

  Portia : What kind of chatter?

  Drexyl : That he's gone ripper.

  Dean Winchester : As in "Jack the"?

• Portia : [James is about to astral project with Sam and Dean]  James, are you sure you're still even able to do this?

  Dean Winchester : Oh, well, that's a confidence builder. Anything else I should know before I become some disembodied thing, completely at his mercy?

• Phillippe LeChat : Tell me about James. Lot of buzz out there.

  Portia : All gossip. The community has a little attitude going.

  Phillippe LeChat : He brings it on himself. The whole cop thing; "witch cop" -- is he nuts?

  Dean Winchester : I said the exact same thing.

• Dean Winchester : [after killing Spencer]  Well, kids, don't try this at home.

• Sam Winchester : We do owe him.

  Dean Winchester : The guy saved our lives *once*, Sammy. It's not like the guy...

  Sam Winchester : Saved our lives?

• Dean Winchester : I got to ask. I can't help but wonder-...

  Portia : Which came first, dog or girl?

  Dean Winchester : Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I'm just curious as to which one you consider yourself, mostly.

  Portia : This have anything to do with what I told you about James and me last night? How you're imagining it?

  Dean Winchester : What? No, that's...

  [Owns up] 

  Dean Winchester : Yes.

• James Frampton : A witch can "go" to a place without having to go to a place.

  Dean Winchester : What, like phone sex?

• Dean Winchester : Wow, of all the lame-ass things you've ever said; that's gotta be the lame-assiest.

  Sam Winchester : I'm sorry, but I happen to think Shemp was a funnier Stooge than Curly.

  Dean Winchester : Curly was a freaking genius.

  Sam Winchester : I always found Curly's work a bit obvious.

  Dean Winchester : It's supposed to be obvious, man. They're Stooges.

• Portia : We have an unusual relationship. Familiars aren't supposed to be sexually involved with their witches.

  Dean Winchester : [Flustered]  Understandable, you know, considering that you're a... well, and that he's... That's...

  [Turns to Sam] 

  Dean Winchester : Little help here?

  [Sam shakes his head no] 

• Drexyl : They're gonna give James two choices: leave or the full hara-kiri.

  Dean Winchester : Suicide?

  Drexyl : Witches appreciate a grand gesture.

• Portia : The familiar finds the master, and they become inseparable.

  Dean Winchester : Guess a lot of people feel that way about their pets.

  [She turns angrily] 

  Dean Winchester : What?

  Portia : I'm *not* James' pet!

  Dean Winchester : Well, not all the time.