liveaholic Reviews

Speak No Evil (2022)

Prepare to yell "why would you do that?" throughout this movie

[5/10 · 27 May 2024]

This was a difficult film to watch, and also a difficult one to rate/review.

It was well-acted, tense, and uncomfortable to watch at times. In a way, I think the movie has a lot going for it. But that's predicated on your ability to entirely suspend disbelief.

Obvious spoilers (and review is marked as such)...but the other couple being unveiled as essentially mass serial killers is where this movie falls apart for me.

I can ignore reality a bit when watching movies, but in order for this to all take place, you'd need countless families that clearly make similar awful decisions. You'd also need multiple incompetent police departments, as no doubt they'd have people looking for each family within days of them going missing. Not sure if the modus operandi was the same way every time, but in this particular case, they received a postcard from them, told friends about the trip, and used their credit cards at their destination.

It also would be much more believable had they just killed them straight away. But having a weekend get-together honestly makes no sense. They would have been seen together, and even used their credit card at least once that we know of.

And what exactly was their motive?

I will spare you the details, but the "victim" couple made so many bad decisions, and ignored their best instincts again, and again.. and again. You will find yourself saying/thinking "what are you doing?!" over & over.

By the last 40 minutes, I was basically rooting against them. How people can ignore so many red flags is beyond me. Because some obviously shady couple continues to guilt you into staying with them? Hard for me to sympathize when you had multiple chances to remove yourself from the situation.

If you're into slow-burn horror/thrillers like this, I'd actually recommend it. But it's too far-fetched for me.

Run (I) (2020)

A poor man's Misery

[6/10 · 26 May 2024]

So, this is essentially the same concept as Misery (they are even a couple Stephen King references in the movie). Unfortunately for "Run", Misery is a far superior film.

Kiera Allen delivered a good performance overall, but Sarah Paulson's acting and cookie-cutter "crazy lady" character didn't come off believable to me. 95% of the acting in the movie comes from those two characters.

There are a few twists and turns that I thought were interesting, and it IS fairly entertaining...so while it might be worth watching, it felt mostly like a poor man's modern remake of Misery. And Paulson is no Kathy Bates.

Bodies Bodies Bodies (2022)

I thought this was supposed to be a comedy...

[2/10 · 27 September 2023]

It's not even slightly funny. I assumed it would be full of "zoomer humor", but it's not. It's just smattered with catchphrases and bad one-liners. None of the characters are likeable, or interesting, or good actors, for that matter.

However, if you like listening to girls arguing for 60 minutes of the 90-ish minute runtime, then you're in LUCK. Because this is the ideal movie for that.

I was naively hoping that it would actually get better as it went on, only to be shocked at how worse it gets. And before you say "well, it's satire". Yeah, it's satire all right. The joke is the time you waste watching it.

Halloween Ends (2022)

Who was this written for?

[2/10 · 14 October 2022]

First off, this movie is FAR too long...and i'm saying that about a movie that's under 2 hours in length. For the first 40 minutes, it's just nonsense buildup and crappy dialogue.

Jamie Lee Curtis reprises her role (of course) in the 13th movie in the series... are there still people who care about seeing her in these movies? I am a huge fan of the original Halloween, but my lord, we are 45 years out...let's move on already.

Obviously they are just cashing checks at this point, rather than trying to actually make a solid horror movie. Even the title "Halloween Ends" seems to allude to the fact that it is finally over...but we all know that won't be the case, and they will keep making these until the well is completely dry.

Skip this one. Do yourself a favor...watch the original Halloween & Halloween II, and stop there.

The Shallows (2016)

If you're into sharks or surfing, might be worth a watch

[5/10 · 15 July 2022]

Blake Lively plays a young surfer who has the misfortune of running into what can only be described as a psychotic killer shark.

Starts a little slow with the story setup (which, frankly, didn't add much to this movie in my opinion), but once it gets "into it", it's pretty much a thriller until the very end.

The premise is believable enough, but as the movie goes on, it slips further & further into a ridiculous scenario that would never actually happen. Wish they would have kept the interactions a bit more believable later on, as it would have made for a stronger movie, if you ask me.

The Matrix Resurrections (I) (2021)

Like a cheap knock off

[3/10 · 28 December 2021]

What an unnecessary catastrophe this film is.

First off, Keanu has never really had the greatest acting chops, but at least he played the part of stoic Neo fairly well in the first 3 movies. In Resurrections, he either sounds like he's reading his lines off a cue card, or struggling to remember them.

Was the CGI better somehow in 1999, or why do most of the scenes look incredibly fake? The fighting & action mostly feel like they're just going through the motions...there are few (if any) "wow that was cool" kind of moments. Not sure how they make a 2hr 30min movie about a virtual reality world so incredibly uninteresting, but they nailed it, if that was their intention.

Like many others, I was a HUGE fan of the original Matrix, and honestly enjoyed the entire trilogy. But this is just an abomination...almost a parody of the previous films. In fact, they make so many references to the first few movies, that it just makes you wish you were watching them instead.

What a disappointment.

Brightburn (2019)

Evil Superman? Sign me up

[8/10 · 3 November 2021]

Fun movie, definitely a bit predictable and over-the-top, but at face value, a pretty solid movie. Kinda enjoyed watching Superman be the bad guy for once.

Revenge (II) (2017)

A visual and auditory masterpiece

[8/10 · 1 November 2021]

That being said, the movie ITSELF isn't a masterpiece, but it certainly is a great ride. Gorgeous cinematography, music, and overall visuals make it extremely engaging to watch. In a sense it's your "typical" revenge flick, but I don't know how you walk away from this movie without feeling like you had a fantastic cinematic experience.

Halloween Kills (2021)

Evil dies tonight!

[6/10 · 18 October 2021]

That's the mantra of the entire film.. although considering I've lost count of the number of sequels, it certainly must be true.

As a popcorn slasher, this movie checks all the boxes.. but that's about all it does. There are some great kills for sure, and the initial setup/flashbacks kept me intrigued, but the payoff is pretty meh.

The Blackcoat's Daughter (I) (2015)

Style over substance

[5/10 · 15 October 2021]

Visually, the movie is beautiful. The soundtrack is droning and unsettling throughout (in a good way), and does most of the work in setting the tone of the movie. The film itself is 90 minutes long, but you have to wonder how much of that time is spent simply watching someone's facial expression, or staring into the distance. I didn't hate the artsy style necessarily, but it's pretty much the definition of a "slow burn". Watching someone stare out a window or slowly descend a staircase is only made creepy due to the eerie music...apart from that, it doesn't really serve much of a purpose to progress the actual story. Those types of scenes make up half of the film, and honestly, they don't really work for me.

It started out very promising and kept me intrigued, but the payoff is ultimately a letdown. This is probably one of those "you'll either love it or hate it films", and that's why I'm splitting that vote to give it a 5/10. I think the arthouse style is done very well, but at the end of the day, it's all style over substance.

Suspiria (1977)

Style over substance indeed

[5/10 · 7 October 2021]

To the film's credit, the cinematography is quite captivating, and the music is iconic. That being said, the writing is simply not good and the acting is, frankly, dreadful. Scenes often seem to abruptly end for no discernable reason.. in fact, I found myself playing back a few scenes just to see if I somehow missed something....nope, just very odd editing decisions.

While there are a few somewhat gory or unsettling moments, a large portion of the movie is spent watching either emotionless lines being delivered, or straight-up unrealistic dialogue that you'd think was written by a 7-year old. Most of the time, you can clearly tell the actors are just waiting for the other person to finish their line, so they can immediately say their own. Comes across very unnatural and really prevents you from making any connection to any of the characters.

This may have some legitimate reasons for becoming a cult classic, but at the end of the day, it's a pretty mediocre film.

Old (2021)

Is this supposed to be a joke?

[2/10 · 4 October 2021]

HOW could the writer/director of this movie be the same person who wrote & directed movies like The Sixth Sense, Signs, and Unbreakable..? I have no explanation.

Where even to start? The concept is at least somewhat intriguing (which is why it gets a 2/10 instead of a 1/10), but the writing & acting are so bad, it becomes virtually unredeemable. The camerawork & sound editing are some of the worst I've seen in ANY movie... I've seen high school film projects that look like Citizen Kane compared to this. The editing is so jarring at times, that it became very distracting. When your movie takes place on a beach, with ocean waves constantly rolling in, you can't just do a "jump cut" to another person's dialogue and not have the audio match up. It is SO amateurish, and honestly insulting to the audience's intelligence.

Host (II) (2020)

I've been more frightened during real-life Zoom calls

[5/10 · 3 October 2021]

I wanted to like this, I really did. But the found-footage/self-shot/shaky-cam genre is so played out, that I can barely take them seriously anymore. The gimmick has lost all effectiveness for me.

Don't get me wrong, I'm impressed with how effective you can make a horror movie these days on a shoe-string budget, and Host makes the magic happen about as efficiently as possible.

On a personal level though, this just gets added to the multitude of other found-footage films that I've seen over the last couple decades, that will soon be forgotten and likely never be thought of again.

Resolution (III) (2012)

Horror?

[6/10 · 9 April 2021]

If you're looking for a horror film, don't bother. If you're looking for a little sci-fi suspense, probably worth a watch. The film starts off with an interesting plotline, which kept me intrigued. But ultimately, next-to-nothing interesting happens throughout 80% of the movie. I did enjoy the dynamic between the two main characters, however this is a great example of a movie with tons of potential, and very little payoff.

Hell House LLC (2015)

Why did I give this a chance?

[3/10 · 8 April 2021]

Even though the found-footage genre has been beaten to death again & again, I read some good reviews of this film, so I thought I'd give it a chance. What a disappointment. The premise is simple enough, all the characters have the personality of a bath mat, and are just about as likeable. Not too many movies do I root for the deaths of the main characters, but after making countless stupid decisions, it's pretty easy to start hoping they get what's coming to them. I'd estimate approximately 1/2 of the movie has a spooky "vibe" while there are about 3-4 somewhat scary scenes. Also, whoever holds these cameras needs serious help, as I think a 5-year old on roller skates could hold a cell phone camera more steady.

Only reason I'm giving it a 3/10 is because I've seen far worse found-footage films. If you can suspend all semblance of logic & common sense, and happen to love this genre, you'll probably like it. For everyone else, it should be a hard pass.

Crawl (I) (2019)

Should have just gone straight to SyFy

[3/10 · 12 December 2020]

Given that this was produced by Sam Raimi and Directed by Alexandre Aja (also directed "High Tension"), I went into this movie intrigued and optimistic. 25 minutes in, I already knew my expectations had led me down the wrong path. Crawl is a step "above" the SyFy-made movies in some aspects, and actually beneath them in plenty of other ways. At least SyFy is aware they are making crappy, campy movies with ridiculous plots. This movie seems unaware that they are doing the same thing, and it suffers a lot because of it. The CGI is MAYBE a step above SyFy direct-to-TV releases, but that's not saying much. A pathetic amount of jumpscares also litter the film, and almost all of them are totally unnecessary. The stupid character decisions actually had me rooting against them after about 30 minutes into the film. Despite a somewhat intriguing premise, decent camerawork, and a solid general atmosphere, this movie is very forgettable.

Stalker (1979)

I'm actually amazed they can make a film 2 hours and 41 minutes long where nothing happens

[5/10 · 18 November 2020]

Don't get me wrong, I don't hate the movie. It does have some incredible imagery and an intriguing concept. But wow, they couldn't have drawn this out more if they used a pencil. Crazy idea for editing this film.. but take each scene (with no dialogue, as there isn't a ton to begin with) and take them from 50 seconds to 5 seconds. You'd get this film under 2 hours without missing any content whatsoever.

Class Action Park (2020)

Give me a break

[4/10 · 15 November 2020]

"The water in the wave pool was murky because of muddy runoff, human waste, suntan lotion, and gore from open wounds."

Sensationalize much?

Chris Gethard's commentary is completely ridiculous, as are most of the people they interviewed, to be perfectly honest.

It was a friggin' theme park, which honestly I would have loved to had the ability to go to. I understand they needed to make it sound like some sort of "death park" to make the documentary more interesting, but it comes off as being disingenuous and honestly mostly BS.

Alien: Resurrection (1997)

What were they thinking, exactly?

[3/10 · 3 November 2020]

Pretty crazy how they could screw up a franchise this much, after Alien & Aliens are both essentially masterpieces in their own way. You need only watch until the ridiculous basketball scene (about 20 minutes in) to see how much they missed the mark. It gets marginally better from that point on, but not enough to redeem this mistake of a film.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987)

A campy classic

[7/10 · 1 November 2020]

Despite the fact that Patricia Arquette is an awful actress, this movie overall is actually quite entertaining. Unlike Nightmare on Elm Street 2, which deviated from a lot of what made the original so great, Dream Warriors goes back to it's roots. Heather Langenkamp reprises her role and is a welcome addition. There are a smattering of other teenagers cast with very apparent stereotypes as well.

A few great/gory moments, much better special effects than Nightmare 2, and a plot that...well, let's just say it was ok. Freddy is also a bit more entertaining, and really seems to show a little more of his dark character. It's a solid sequel, I'll just leave it at that.

Borat Subsequent Moviefilm (2020)

doesn't have the same feel anymore.

[4/10 · 1 November 2020]

Feels a bit too fake, and nobody in the film even gets that upset. Da Ali G Show was amazing, because you could tell he was simply sitting in a room with REAL people and they had no idea they were a part of the joke. I enjoyed the first Borat film, but this one just feels too unrealistic to me. It's possible the bits were all with people who had no idea this was Sacha Baron Cohen, but i sincerely doubt it. The dialogue and things people say seem much more rehearsed than bits on Da Ali G Show.

Sure, the social commentary is interesting, and I like that Cohen still doesn't shy away from any topic. But the "shock value" in this film consists of a lot of gross/ridiculous scenes with him & his daughter, where the meat & potatoes of Borat should be his interactions with everyday people. Just my $.02 on a mostly forgettable movie.

Halloween (2007)

Why though?

[1/10 · 31 October 2020]

Don't remake classics. This film was totally unnecessary. One would think Mr. Zombie (a self-proclaimed horror connoisseur) would know better. Apparently not.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)

STOP making movies with the exact same name as the original

[1/10 · 15 October 2020]

This "trend" has gone way, way too far. If you want to make a bad remake (or even worse, a reboot), please for the love of all that's holy, name it something else. Also, why exactly are we remaking classic horror films? If anything, the case can be made to remake BAD horror movies and turn them into something better...not the other way around.

Alien 3 (1992)

What a colossal disappointment...

[5/10 · 8 October 2020]

It was going to be tough to live up to expectations, as the first two movies are both incredible in their own ways. But somehow this film manages to actually lower the bar even further than one would expect. The atmosphere is nowhere near as intriguing or interesting as the first two films, the characters are almost all forgettable, and certain decisions regarding characters from the previous films make one wonder "what in the world were they thinking??"

Somehow, the effects were worse than the films from the previous decade. The use of CGI might have been cool back in 1992, but it does not hold up at all today.

I was honestly somewhat surprised to see that David Fincher directed this, as he has made some incredible films since. Given, this was his first effort in filmmaking, and I don't necessarily blame the directing, but more so whoever approved of this script.

It's a 5/10 because Sigourney Weaver is back and still as tough as ever, and there were some good scenes/performances, especially near the middle of the film, which contained the most suspenseful moments. The beginning is pretty trite, and the movie simply falls off the rails at the end.

Overall, a huge disappointment. Even a moderately-good effort would have cemented the Alien movies as one of the best trilogies of all time. Unfortunately, this film is just too much of an outcast to be taken seriously when compared to the first two movies in the franchise.

Carrie (2013)

I guess they thought the world needed this?

[4/10 · 7 October 2020]

I mean... I'll be honest. If you'd never heard of or knew of "Carrie" before, you'd probably enjoy this reboot. But the original Carrie is a horror classic. I actually just watched the ORIGINAL for the first time 2 years ago, and expected it to be dated/corny, but it holds up surprisingly well. Literally the only reason to remake this movie is for a cash-grab from a newer generation who apparently don't know anything about movies before the turn of the century.

Also not a huge fan of the casting of Chloë Grace Moretz. She's quite pretty to be a supposed social outcast. Someone like Saoirse Ronan (who would have been 18 or 19 at the time of filming), would have fit the Carrie "look/feel" a lot better, in my opinion.

In summary, an enjoyable enough horror film if you have no prior knowledge of anything about the book, previous film, or general plot. Regardless, just do yourself a favor and watch the original.