Nope. I don't see it it all.

by neil-476 | created - 31 Dec 2013 | updated - 20 Mar 2015 | Public

Performers who are successful but I really don't understand why.

1. Ryan Gosling

Actor | Blue Valentine

Born Ryan Thomas Gosling on November 12, 1980, in London, Ontario, Canada, he is the son of Donna (Wilson), a secretary, and Thomas Ray Gosling, a traveling salesman. Ryan was the second of their two children, with an older sister, Mandi. His ancestry is French-Canadian, as well as English, ...

This chap, currently flavour of the month, always plays an emotionless plank of wood. He says his lines efficiently enough, but imparts no personality or passion to his playing.

2. Julia Roberts

Actress | Pretty Woman

Julia Fiona Roberts never dreamed she would become the most popular actress in America. She was born in Smyrna, Georgia, to Betty Lou (Bredemus) and Walter Grady Roberts, one-time actors and playwrights, and is of English, Irish, Scottish, Welsh, German, and Swedish descent. As a child, due to her ...

She projects a feeling of "How wonderful I am!" in a series of similar performances. I don't care for the air of self-satisfaction she exudes.

3. Owen Wilson

Actor | The Royal Tenenbaums

Self-proclaimed troublemaker Owen Cunningham Wilson was born in Dallas, to Irish-American parents originally from Massachusetts. He grew up in Texas with his mother, Laura (Cunningham), a photographer; his father, Robert Andrew Wilson, an ad exec; and his brothers, Andrew Wilson (the eldest) and ...

An amiable enough fellow, but he seems incapable of giving more than one performance. And he's given that one a LOT.

4. Martin Lawrence

Actor | Martin

Martin Fitzgerald Lawrence is an African-American comedian, producer, writer, director and actor. He is known for his roles in the Bad Boys trilogy, Martin, Def Comedy Jam, Big Momma's House, Open Season, House Party, Boomerang, Wild Hogs, What's Happening Now!!, Nothing to Lose, Life and Blue ...

Can it be coincidence that the personality he projects in his movies is so resolutely unpleasant, even when he is supposed to be a sympathetic protagonist? His lower profile these days indicates that others also think he's awful.

5. Adam Sandler

Actor | The Waterboy

Adam Richard Sandler was born September 9, 1966 in Brooklyn, New York, to Judith (Levine), a teacher at a nursery school, and Stanley Alan Sandler, an electrical engineer. He is of Russian Jewish descent. At 17, he took his first step towards becoming a stand-up comedian when he spontaneously took ...

Sandler throws away the fact that he can actually act on a series of horrible performances in a series of even worse films. He seems to make a virtue out of being as irritating as possible.

6. Kristen Stewart

Actress | Snow White and the Huntsman

Though most famous for her role as Isabella "Bella" Swan in The Twilight (2008) Saga, Kristen Stewart has been a working actor since her early years in Los Angeles, California. Her parents, John Stewart and Jules Stewart, both work in film and television. The family includes three boys, Kristen's ...

Stewart is another performer who has some ability, yet she seems to concentrate on giving one-note performances of unattractive sullenness. The Twiglet movies may have bolstered her bank balance, but they have done nothing to enhance her credibility as a performer.

7. James Franco

Actor | Spring Breakers

Known for his breakthrough starring role on Freaks and Geeks (1999), James Franco was born April 19, 1978 in Palo Alto, California, to Betsy Franco, a writer, artist, and actress, and Douglas Eugene "Doug" Franco, who ran a Silicon Valley business. His mother is Jewish and his father was of ...

Franco exudes an air of insufferable smugness in almost everything he does, but he has yet to convince me that he can actually act. His brother consistently outperforms him by a comfortable margin.

8. Daniel Radcliffe

Actor | Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Daniel Jacob Radcliffe was born on July 23, 1989 in Fulham, London, England, to casting agent Marcia Gresham (née Jacobson) and literary agent Alan Radcliffe. His father is from a Northern Irish Protestant background, while his mother was born in South Africa, to a Jewish family (from Lithuania, ...

Radcliffe's Potter performances were like his stature - exactly the same in the final film as in the first one: wooden and diminutive respectively. His adult filmography has yet to emerge from woodenhood.

9. Will Ferrell

Producer | Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

John William Ferrell was born in Irvine, California, to Betty Kay (Overman), a teacher, and Roy Lee Ferrell, Jr., a musician. His parents were originally from Roanoke Rapids, North Carolina.

A graduate of the University of Southern California, Ferrell became interested in performing while a student ...

I add Will Ferrell to this list with some reluctance, because he is an actor of considerable ability. Yet, with a few exceptions, he choses to play characters who set my teeth on edge.

10. Blake Lively

Actress | Gossip Girl

Blake Ellender Lively was born Blake Ellender Brown on August 25, 1987 in Los Angeles, California to Elaine Lively & Ernie Lively. Her brother is actor Eric Lively, and her half-siblings are actors Lori Lively, Robyn Lively and Jason Lively. She followed her parents' and siblings' steps. Her first ...

I have now seen Miss Lively in two films: Green Lantern and Savages. In neither does her performance make me want to seek out a third.

11. Jack Black

Actor | School of Rock

Thomas Jacob "Jack" Black was born on August 28, 1969 in Santa Monica, California and raised in Hermosa Beach, California to Judith Love Cohen & Thomas William Black, both satellite engineers. He is of Russian Jewish & British-German ancestry. Black attended the University of California at Los ...

Interestingly, I add Mr Black solely in his incarnation as a performer in alleged comedies. As a straight actor he isn't bad at all. But I am bemused, not to mention downright puzzled, as to why this bloke has been selected to headline a succession of comedies which have two things in common: Jack Black and an absence of humour.

12. Danny McBride

Actor | Pineapple Express

Daniel Richard McBride is an American actor, comedian, producer, and writer. He starred in the HBO television series Eastbound & Down, Vice Principals, and The Righteous Gemstones, also co-creating the former two with frequent collaborator Jody Hill while creating the latter himself. He has ...

Mr McBride espouses a branch of humour - aggressive unpleasantness - which seems to me to be inherently the exact opposite of funny.

13. Orlando Bloom

Actor | The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

Orlando Jonathan Blanchard Copeland Bloom was born on January 13, 1977 in Canterbury, Kent, England. His mother, Sonia Constance Josephine Bloom (née Copeland), was born in Kolkata, India, to an English family then-resident there. The man he first knew as his father, Harry Bloom, was a legendary ...

I am perhaps being a little harsh in adding Orlando Bloom - Legolas is a pretty solid character, in both his LOTR and Hobbit incarnations. But outside Middle Earth, Bloom seems to have failed to stamp anything meaningful on the characters he has played, and I'm including the Pirates films. Even the cowardly Paris in Troy was merely another pretty whitebread.

14. Ed Westwick

Actor | Gossip Girl

Edward Jack Peter Westwick is an English actor and musician best known for his role as Chuck Bass on The CW's Gossip Girl as well as Vincent Swan in the TV series White Gold. He made his feature film debut in Children of Men (2006) and has since appeared in the films Breaking and Entering (2006), ...

I'm told he is a heartthrob, a pinup. Really?

To be fair, I have no complaints about his acting. Other than as a heartthrob, a pinup.

15. Jonathan Rhys Meyers

Actor | Den 12. mann

Jonathan Rhys Meyers was born Jonathan Michael Meyers on July 27, 1977, in Dublin, Ireland, to Mary Geraldine (Meyers) and John O'Keeffe, a musician. He and his family moved to County Cork, Ireland, when the actor was nearly a year old, and then, at the age of 3, his father left the family, leaving...

He has achieved leading man status despite often appearing to be anything but. It might help if he didn't so often sport facial hair in the form of anaemic bum-fluff, feeble moustaches, straggly immature chin growth and the like.

16. Kevin James

Actor | Paul Blart: Mall Cop

Kevin James was born Kevin George Knipfing on April 26, 1965, in Mineola, Long Island, New York, to Janet (Klein), an office worker, and Joseph Valentine Knipfing, Jr., an insurance agency owner. He was raised in Stony Brook, and attended SUNY Cortland, where he played fullback on the football team...

Fat bloke plays clumsy fat bloke. Sorry, but why is this funny, exactly?



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